Posted by JayJ on September 29, 2008, at 20:33:28
In reply to Re: What lurks underneath idealization? » lucie lu, posted by lemonaide on September 29, 2008, at 19:25:41
Maybe I'm being a bit dense (nothing unusual there) but isn't the whole arrangement an idealization. If things go as they should, we have in our T someone who is only interested in our welfare, without bringing in their own problems. If that's not ideal, I don't know what is :) Depending on our individual background/problem, I guess we each put into this person what we most wish for, in my case, having a problem childhood, I see some kind of ideal parent I never had, although this can get blurred over into a partner who also cares about my every concern/need (blush). I love it :) Yes, it's unreal. If I think about it, I know my T cannot be such a person in real life - I'm sure he does care about me, but nobody can really do the whole deal for just me all day every day. Especially since I know he must turn around and do the same thing for the other 10 or more patients that I know he must have, and almost certainly be just as good and caring with them. But, if I let myself suspend reality, the idealization lets me work with him to rebuild or maybe build for the first time - I hope. Maybe I haven't been at this long enough or perhaps I'm missing something important?
JayJ
poster:JayJ
thread:854814
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080920/msgs/854847.html