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Re: This isn't fun any more

Posted by caraher on June 30, 2006, at 14:32:21

In reply to This isn't fun any more, posted by Tamar on June 30, 2006, at 13:49:28

Sorry you're not doing so well.

Regarding this latest session I have a question and a semi-suggestion. The question is whether you couldn't start your next session by insisting on exploring the question of your needing/wanting to know what he looks like? Perhaps I simply fail to grasp how evasive he may be when it comes to this question, and you really have tried to confront this issue. But reading your post I get the impression that your 18-year-old is voicing all these things inside your head and not through your lips.

What your T says may be true, but he may simply be failing to recognize the degree to which some people find the visual image important to making the connections he says, perhaps rightly, you really need.

The semi-suggestion is that your 18-year-old might engage in a single act of misbehavior by taking a picture of him. Then you'd be able to have an image to hold onto between sessions. But when you talk about wanting to misbehave in order to get attention I'm not sure whether allowing that one small piece of mischief would really get you what you want. Is it *his* attention you want? Or attention from others, either specific other people or from "people in general?" It would be scary to feel that way, and it would be nice if there were some way to figure out what your genuine needs are in order to meet those and lessen the impulse toward these probably unhealthy desires.


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poster:caraher thread:662944
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060623/msgs/662955.html