Posted by happyflower on June 23, 2006, at 17:20:13
In reply to Re: How do you move on from an abusive childhood? » happyflower, posted by Tamar on June 21, 2006, at 19:29:40
Wow, Tamar, you sure know how to make this happyflower feel good! Thank you so much for validating me being a mother and a wife. It is sometimes hard to look at the positive from all the abuse.
You are so right, I do need some supportive people in my life right now and I don't. I have issolated myself for so long, but slowly I am meeting new people and have chances at friendships. I have met a lot of really neat people at the gym since I am there almost everyday and hopefully college will help too.
You asked me why I felt I needed to be a better person. Well I believe I have some behaviors that need to be controlled that seem to offend other people.
Like for instance my T , he knows me better than anyone, I am fond of him and really like him, but why do I take my anger out on him? Why can't I control the hurt I feel. Why am I over sensitive. I have gotten better, but I have a long way to go.
Plus I have trouble trusting people, especially women. When I feel myself getting close to someone, I get scared, and sabatoge the relationship before they can hurt me. I don't know how to stop doing that.And you are so right, abused surviors are treated differently than others. Some people just don't understand it. My T told me that telling someone about this kind of thing, is best saved for when I really get to know this person and can trust them with small stuff first. He said to take it in steps.
I guess what I am really asking is, will I ever be okay? Will I ever be able to stop therapy and life life normally? I just don't know. Thanks for you wise words Tamar. You seem to know just what to say. :-)
poster:happyflower
thread:659801
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060623/msgs/660695.html