Posted by fairywings on April 19, 2006, at 12:29:07
My T and I were talking at my appt. 2 weeks ago, and somehow my husband's work came up. I told him about this woman at my husband work who has always been interested in him. I never felt too threatened, but didn't like it at all, and my husband knew how I felt.
Later that evening, after my appt., my husband mentioned something about this woman (he doesn't talk about her too much), and all of a sudden a lightbulb went on. I realized he knows WAY too much about her and her kid! He knows more about her day to day stuff, her feelings, and her kid, than he knows about me or our kids! All of a sudden I realized he's been having an emotional involvement with this woman for at least 3 years!
There are a LOT of specifics....I won't go into them here. But, he's defended her, he flat out refuses to go to therapy with me, and he denies being involved - but the evidence is too overwhelming....and I caught him in a lie last week. He's not a bad guy, he loves me, but he's SO naive, and emotionally "not there" for me.
I can't believe I never saw it before! I can't believe I was SO stupid! I"m so mad and so hurt that I can't be nice to him. I'm mad and can't hide it from our kids, and I'm sure it's hurting them. I'm so depressed I just want to go to bed and sleep. I'm so tired.
Has anyone else been through this? What did you do? How did you feel when you found out? What if you're too mad to deal with your husband in a civil way?
I have no skills, no job, and nowhere to go! I feel like I'm stuck.
fw
poster:fairywings
thread:634788
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060406/msgs/634788.html