Posted by 10derHeart on September 11, 2005, at 12:22:09
In reply to Hi, I'm GG. I'm a cryer, posted by gardenergirl on September 11, 2005, at 9:28:47
I'm pretty much similar to you, gg.
I can't remember a session for a long time where I haven't cried.
I don't mind too much any more. Try not to think of how ugly I probably look. When I've mentioned that to T., he says he's so focused on my tone of voice (hurt) and what I'm telling him (pain) at those times, he NEVER notices what crying might do to my face.
Hmm..I guess I believe him.
I usually don't cry on the way home. Just feel drained and relieved and somewhat *lighter.* Funny, though, I often cry on the way there. I think that's anticipation of the fact I *can* cry there, and I just think too much about what I might say, what he might say, and the tears
come...I have a love-hate relationship with my own tears in therapy, it seems. Love them because that stuff just can't stay bottled up forever....it just poisons me eventually. Hate them because I do feel too open and unable to *control* the session, as far as showing how I really feel about something at my own pace any longer...the darn tears kind of give it all away...
Lately I've noticed, I have this tendency when my T. asks about something, or makes an observation, and it hits a nerve I didn't realize I even had till that second.....as I'm crying I keep saying, "don't say that, don't say that." If I peek at him then ('cause I've probably been looking down 98% of the time) he looks sad. :-(
<sigh> It's hard. How can we produce so many tears anyway?!
your friend in sogginess - 10der
poster:10derHeart
thread:553529
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050901/msgs/553751.html