Posted by Tamar on April 22, 2005, at 4:38:34
In reply to Can someone help, please?? » antigua, posted by Shortelise on April 22, 2005, at 0:00:18
Antigua,
I terminated recently, and when I was approaching termination I felt a lot of fear that I hadn’t finished working through all the trauma. But I came to realise that it would never be completely finished; it felt more like a change than an ending. Talking about the nasty stuff in therapy was really hard at the time, but it helped so much. I finally feel as if I can live with myself, if that makes sense.For me, it was a matter of recognising that I can’t erase my problems. I can’t undo the bad things that happened to me and I can’t make it all go away. But after therapy I feel that some of the broken parts of me are healing. There will always be a scar, or a weakness within me, but it doesn’t define me and it doesn’t hurt every minute of every day. I don’t have to hide from it any more.
So I think I did get over most of the guilt and shame. Sometimes I still feel shame, but therapy taught me ways of moving past those feelings when they threaten to overwhelm me. When I started therapy I couldn’t understand what people meant when they said they preferred to be described as survivors rather than victims. I was a victim. But I think I get it now. I’m surviving and it’s because I worked very hard in therapy to start healing.
ShortE,
I think the stage you’re going through is just as hard as working through the pain, because facing the end of therapy is a process in itself and it can feel quite discouraging. Don’t be too hard on yourself. It’s a new step and it takes time to get used to it.(((((Antigua))))) and (((((ShortE)))))
Tamar
poster:Tamar
thread:486282
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050420/msgs/487788.html