Posted by judy1 on January 2, 2005, at 13:48:42
In reply to Re: Forever therapy - Spoke to my therapist, posted by Dinah on January 1, 2005, at 9:23:22
> Does anyone have any ideas about how it's even possible to meet therapy needs in the outside world, given that therapy isn't a friendship or lover or anything like that relationship? Therapy is therapy. Do people who haven't had a therapeutic relationship know how different it is from friendship or anything else in the real world?
That's an interesting question, Dinah. I agree with you that the therapy you receive from your therp is impossible to replicate through a friend or spouse, etc.- simply because you don't have that 'supposed' objectivity. I've served as a surrogate therp to a LOT of people- I have been blessed/cursed with a strong sense of empathy that my friends and family gravitate towards. But to keep my own feelings from tainting any advice is impossible for me. And in a circular fashion, I've come to realize that my own therps aren't all that objective either (when it comes to me). But I tend to sabotage any of my therapeutic gains, and you certainly don't fit into that category. I am definitely rambling here.
OK- what I was trying to write originally was I hope you are working hard with your therp to rid yourself of any guilt you feel about how often you go, it's nobody's business but your own. It sounds like you continue to gain a lot, so how can that possibly be a bad thing? Another worry of mine (for you) is the whole abandonment thing- I'm really concerned how strongly you worded your feelings. I suspect that's something you work on in therapy. I had (I believe it's out of me now) a really bad case of that myself, and having survived 2 terminations- I can honestly say I no longer fear it (not to say I didn't suffer pretty badly, the first one did involve a suicide attempt but the second was just grieving. And that's where I am now, turning the acceptance of losing a therp to the gaining of a friend.
sorry this was so disjointed.
take care, judy
poster:judy1
thread:436168
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041228/msgs/436811.html