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Re: Request for clarification

Posted by Dr. Bob on November 1, 2004, at 3:15:57

In reply to Request for clarification, posted by alexandra_k on October 31, 2004, at 19:43:43

> Asking someone to rephrase is much nicer than receiving a PBC

Hmm, I think of it as asking more...

> I say this because I have to honestly say that I have tried my best to be supportive here, but have received 1 request to rephrase, and 2 PBC's. I am starting to feel like my best isn't up to the standards of this board. It hurts to get PBC's.

I'm sorry you've been hurt, but this isn't always easy to do. Have you considered asking someone to be your "civility buddy"?

> A while back I posted this (which you did not respond to).
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20041012/msgs/407274.html

Sorry about that:

> So, to summarise the situation: We are not allowed to say 'I feel _____' where the underscored word is a 'negative emotion' and the phrase occurs in the context of ones response to something that someone else has done, or to another person...

I'm not sure it would help to approach that way...

> We are not allowed to express how we feel.

Not if it could lead others to feel accused or put down.

> I thought it was all about phrasing it in a way that is not unduly hurtful or accusitory to another.

How about not hurtful or accusatory at all? Have you seen Dinah's post about phrasing?

http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20040112/msgs/320097.html

Bob


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poster:Dr. Bob thread:409648
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20041027/msgs/409913.html