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me after this experience

Posted by Hunk20 on May 23, 2010, at 0:11:50

In reply to Nardil so far, posted by Hunk20 on May 22, 2010, at 23:39:45

and i got a motivation for a job. Help people, because all these people grabbed a heart and helped me.. I feel like this gives me a sense of purpose and it makes me happy. I was feeling so sh*tty because i forgot who i am. A sensitive person with a good big heart.
I wont be blinded by the money like bro and dad. Never again. I wanna help folks out because i believe in the good now and theres a lot of people in serious trouble out there.

If nobody did i would have died an emotional death SERIOUSLY. All the pain at once. The mom of my host family gave me a hug while i was crying and saying how i feel. That was the first time i actually felt healthy love. She said "you are gonna be fine". And she believed in it you know. Not the fake sh*t that i heard in my family. I am endlessly thankful for this. This is exactly what never happened in my life.

Sometimes at night or when things get tough i pray to god.. didnt do this since primary school. I was SO far away from him. I never want to go back to being the selfish prick i was and feeling completly empty and numb. Im really scared this will ever happen.
Im very serious about changing myself for the better, being able to give people love and of course recieve a little too.
You know i see a homeless person and buy him a hotdog. Do you know how happy that makes me? i NEVER felt this. Before this whole thing i wouldnt have even seen him.



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Psycho-Babble Medication | Framed

poster:Hunk20 thread:946827
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20100514/msgs/948382.html