Posted by Racer on February 13, 2004, at 9:27:54
In reply to when you are the one who leaves... » Racer, posted by judy1 on February 12, 2004, at 16:05:13
I don't know if I leave first so that I can't be left. When I leave, it's always been for what I can see are really and truly good reasons. I think the "so I won't be left" part is in the people I've chosen to be involved with in the first place, if that makes as much sense as a crazy person can make.
I've had bad experiences with therapists, but never had one "fire" me. My best girlfriend did, though, in a way. She showed up for an appointment, after a couple of years of therapy with this woman, and the good doctor wasn't there. Never called back, never returned my friend's calls, nothing. Then, while my friend was working at a coffee shop for a short while, dr came in with a friend -- said "hi" and nothing more. That's just outrageous, but it's second hand.
Did I feel close to this therapist? Only as close as you can get in two months, but she's the first person I've trusted this much in decades. So, we did a lot of good work in a very short time, and now I get to practice to see if I can make the same leap of faith with the next one. I'm hoping.
Otherwise, lots of changes, which is putting me on a roller coaster ride like you wouldn't believe. Still, better to go through this wild ride knowing it's going to end, than to go on as I had been, one crisis away from suicidal desperation. So, maybe that attitude is what's making me seem so much better. It's not that I'm not spinning around with little control, it's just that I'm hoping that this time the therapy will take, and I'll actually be better.
Thanks for your support.
poster:Racer
thread:311056
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/2000/20040213/msgs/312792.html