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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Tabitha on August 29, 2003, at 0:16:25
Having a downturn this week. I had a weird therapy session Tuesday, it's been 90F in my house, and I've been missing my 'ex' and fighting the urge to call him. My therapist tried to get me to do the usual cognitive crap, but I'm not sure I can really access the negative thoughts in order to challenge them.
Maybe I just needed a little more social contact. I'm seeing a friend tomorrow, but it's not the kind of friend I can confide in about being down.
Feeling a little hopeless, despite having gotten a lot of stuff done this week. I've made big progress on the home re-organization and finding contractors. I don't feel good though, I just feel dead and empty. A little lonely, bordering on needy, so I'm afraid to reach out to anyone. I think I'm giving out weird vibes, you know how you get a little too down, then when you try to reach out you aren't very appealing, because of the depressed vibes?
I'm really tired of this heat. I'd been leaving windows open more, but then got a notice from the neighborhood committee of a woman in my neighborhood, raped in her home after going for a morning walk with a window left open. So now I'm locking the windows at sunset, and the house doesn't cool off much. And that story is making me feel much less safe in my home.
Oh, plus I'm missing the Burning Man festival. I decided not to go this year, for some good reasons, but I'm missing the fun.
I never know where to turn, besides this group. Which is great, but I'd like some real-life support too. I tried a new CoDa meeting, but it didn't seem right somehow. My therapist has an opening in her group, but those groups are more like heavy therapy than support (they bring up a lot of issues).
I feel I'm on the edge of wearing out my existing friends. They aren't very available. That's why I miss the 'ex' so much, he was just soooo available (and high-maintenance).
Maybe I should get a massage.
Posted by Chicklet on August 29, 2003, at 6:02:41
In reply to Down and draggy, posted by Tabitha on August 29, 2003, at 0:16:25
Hey. Sorry you had a bad week. Za heet- eets not helpingk matters, yes? I can't stand it either. but Fall is my absolutelutelutey favorite time of the year and Christmas is only 4 months away (are people going to 'scrroge' me now...I remember the board last Christmas)!! Wee!
Yeah, it sucks that when you feel low, you start missing exes more than you would have before. i hate it. it's amazing how i view everyone and every situation so completely differently depending on an Up or Down. I think I feel like I'm much more dependent and needy when i'm down and that often leads to "Aahh the good ole days" thoughts, whether they're legit or not.
I think just SEEING your friend and getting out -even if this is not a 'self-disclosure' friend will make you feel a little better. Good for you for sticking to it. I cancel on people so much. i just hate it.
>
>because of the depressed vibes?
From what people have told me, I don't (and you probably don't either) put out as many vibes as we think. I could just barely eke out a day and think, "Oh God, I screwed up- my boss is gonna see that I can't write when I'm like this...". And everyone notices and they don't like spending time with me...
I know that my mood is coloring my views but I can stop it. If I could I'd be all better, right?
>
>Burning Man festival. I decided not to go this year, for some good reasons,You will die, i tell you...just die when you read the 'article' from the Onion that I sent you.
Once again, with the "wearing out my friends" feeling...i think we exaggerate that feeling too.
In our own perception anyway.> Maybe I should get a massage.
Sounds like a plan. i'd give you one if you lived out here. Magic fingers, they call me.
Karen
Posted by Tabitha on August 29, 2003, at 13:48:47
In reply to We do not accept down and draggy, posted by Chicklet on August 29, 2003, at 6:02:41
Not so hot today. Tile guy coming at 1:00. Looking forward to seeing friend tonight.
Had my first mammogram this AM and it wasn't as bad as I expected. Plop, Squiiishhh! (tiny voice-- Help me I'm trapped! another tiny voice-- you brute! you're hurting my twin!)
Posted by fallsfall on August 29, 2003, at 14:10:21
In reply to Re: a little peppier this morning, posted by Tabitha on August 29, 2003, at 13:48:47
What a perfect description. You made me laugh.
Posted by Dinah on August 29, 2003, at 20:43:58
In reply to Re: a little peppier this morning, posted by Tabitha on August 29, 2003, at 13:48:47
I'm glad you're feeling peppier. I think I may be wearing out with 3/4 of a pile of mud to go.
I'm also glad you're taking care of your health with your mammogram. I've been getting them regularly for some time as my paternal grandma died relatively early from breast cancer. I've never really minded them, but... Well never mind. Too much info. :)
This is the end of the thread.
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