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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 18 of 18. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by bookgurl99 on August 28, 2002, at 18:59:22
Can I just rant? If I hadn't gotten sick last spring, I'd have done well in school and kept my scholarships; then I wouldn't be working full-time now. Which I do, and it is pretty damn boring. I don't know how people can go straight from high school to one lame-o job after another and be happy with it. This working full-time, it gives me structure but so much BOREDOM.
And mostly, it steals time from me. The time I'd use to complete my degree. But no, here I am, earning money to eventually complete my degree. *sigh* I really want to be done with this epoch and on to something better.
Just had to rant.
I am trying to do more for myself; I've been getting up early to write and exercise before work. I'm starting to make plans with friends. And things are going pretty well with my girlfriend.
But when do I get to stop 'building towards healing' and start having fun???? *sigh*
This is all so exasperating. Don't you ever feel so exasperated over this crappp???????!!!!!
Posted by mair on August 28, 2002, at 20:34:22
In reply to Work is so boring, posted by bookgurl99 on August 28, 2002, at 18:59:22
When I first got sick, I viewed my life as if it was suspended until I could get better. After a very long time, I started to realize that this was a crummy perspective because I was probably going to be dealing with depression related issues for the rest of my life, or certainly for far longer than I could have ever imagined.
It's a tough concept for some of us but I've learned I have to work at living my life instead of just watching and analyzing it.
If you're job serves a useful purpose, then you have to figure out if that purpose is worth the boredom. If it genuinely is not, maybe that should tell you that you're now ready to move on to something else. If you're really stuck with this job, it might be valuable to set some concrete (and realistic) goals as to how long you have to endure this and what comes next. At least that may help you feel that you are tolerating the boredom for a good reason, and more importantly, that you have something to look forward to.
Mair
Posted by bookgurl99 on August 28, 2002, at 21:39:11
In reply to Re: Work is so boring, posted by mair on August 28, 2002, at 20:34:22
I guess you have a good point. I do have to keep living, and I've done a better job of working on that. I'm dealing with a physical illness, so it's unknown what the course of it will be and I can't keep my life on hold until then.
I do see that my job pays better -- $10.50/hour starting -- than other jobs that require no degree in my area. And I will have health insurance in 3 months, which I need badly.
It's just that, up until now, if I was working in a boring job, I would know that it was just temporary, for the summer or academic break. But right now, I'm not sure how long I'll stay there. Maybe a year, maybe a year and a half.
I guess I will have to structure my day as good as I can to give myself a 'life' outside of work, yet take the long view and recognize how this can benefit me.
Something I could do; in a month, I'll have more seniority, and I can request a schedule change so that I would work 3 10-hour days a week and maintain my benefits. So then I'd just spend 3 days a week there.
But arrgh! sometimes.
Posted by Greg A. on August 28, 2002, at 23:38:30
In reply to Work is so boring, posted by bookgurl99 on August 28, 2002, at 18:59:22
"A life unexamined is not worth living" (Plato or Pluto . . . whichever one isn't a Disney character with a black nose)
Depression often leads me to examine my life too much I think. I second guess most of what I do - or don't do. But maybe in the grand scheme of things there is a purpose? Hang in ther Bookgurl - there's a lot of life left for you and if this phase happens to bore the hell out of you . . . do like Mair says and examine it and see is there is some useful purpose.Greg
Posted by Ted on August 29, 2002, at 10:17:27
In reply to Re: Work is so boring, posted by Greg A. on August 28, 2002, at 23:38:30
> "A life unexamined is not worth living" (Plato or Pluto . . . whichever one isn't a Disney character with a black nose)
That would be Plato :-)
My work is boring, my life is boring, and I really don't care anymore. So there.
I feel like all I want to do is run away and escape from this life for a few years, then start over.
Ted
Posted by Dinah on August 29, 2002, at 11:23:34
In reply to Re: Work is so boring, posted by Ted on August 29, 2002, at 10:17:27
In the past week, I've only gotten 2 hours sleep on three nights. I haven't bathed in two days. (I'm making myself sick). And I haven't eaten hardly anything all day.
And I still have not finished yet. Deadline is today.
Boring sounds nice right now.
Posted by Ted on August 29, 2002, at 11:29:50
In reply to Re: I wish work were boring., posted by Dinah on August 29, 2002, at 11:23:34
Dinah,
> In the past week, I've only gotten 2 hours sleep on three nights. I haven't bathed in two days. (I'm making myself sick). And I haven't eaten hardly anything all day.
>
> And I still have not finished yet. Deadline is today.
>
> Boring sounds nice right now.
You're confusing BORING with BUSY. My work is plenty busy, I'm just bored by it.Are you excited & enthusiastic about your work? That's the real test.
Ted
Posted by Dinah on August 29, 2002, at 12:02:38
In reply to Re: I wish work were boring. » Dinah, posted by Ted on August 29, 2002, at 11:29:50
Well, terrified isn't bored either. :)
Posted by mair on August 29, 2002, at 13:01:34
In reply to Re: Work is so boring, posted by Ted on August 29, 2002, at 10:17:27
I know well the occasional desire to walk out on one life and pursue another. It's just the practicalities that are overwelming. I have this picture in mind of women in these 1940's movies who would storm out with the parting remark "I'll send someone for my things." I mean wouldn't you just love sometimes to have a life simple enough for you to be able to cavalierly send someone for your belongings?
Mair
Posted by Heather66 on August 29, 2002, at 15:53:20
In reply to Re: I wish work were boring. » Dinah, posted by Ted on August 29, 2002, at 11:29:50
I was bored, bored, bored for the whole month of July. No life. Work is pointless. So I found things to keep me busy (freelance work on the side), planning a trip.... BY MYSELF by the way since I don't have anyone to go with, which pissed me off, but I've decided to go and enjoy myself anyway. See.. I have to force myself to enjoy myself. I am constantly telling myself that I will have fun on vacation by myself. I will have fun. And I will not be bored. It's all a game. Life is a game. And sometimes when I am busy I can forget that I am also extremely depressed. But I know when I get back, I'll have nothing to do. Hmmm. I guess I'll be bored again in September.
Posted by Ted on August 29, 2002, at 20:04:06
In reply to Busy seems to mask the boredom, posted by Heather66 on August 29, 2002, at 15:53:20
> planning a trip.... BY MYSELF by the way since I don't have anyone to go with, which pissed me off, but I've decided to go and enjoy myself anyway.
I took a month-long Europe vacation last year and I couldn't talk my wife into going. I'm planning a 3-week Europe trip for summer 2003, and I have to twist her arm into going. I told her I'm buying 3 tickets and taking our son and if she doesn't come along I'll have to find an attractive young lady to take her place. That did the trick. :-)
Ted
Posted by mair on August 29, 2002, at 20:36:13
In reply to vacations alone » Heather66, posted by Ted on August 29, 2002, at 20:04:06
All the more power to you that you're taking a vacation by yourself. I would love to have the self assurance to do that. I've run into women traveling alone at a couple of different resorts and I've envied them their independence. I was at a Carribean resort once and there was a young blind woman from Canada traveling only with her guide dog. By the time the plane landed she had pretty much befriended everyone on the plane. The next time I saw her she was riding horses on the beach with some of her new friends. It was so cool.
I don't mean to hold you up to the standard of others. I just think that it takes a special person to vacation alone, and if you had the gumption to think of it and plan it, then i think you probably have what it takes to enjoy yourself.
What kind of vacation do you have planned?
Mair
Posted by Jonathan on August 30, 2002, at 1:10:49
In reply to Re: Work is so boring, posted by Ted on August 29, 2002, at 10:17:27
> > "A life unexamined is not worth living" (Plato or Pluto . . . whichever one isn't a Disney character with a black nose)
>
> That would be Plato :-)Actually, that would be Socrates :-)
But some people wouldn't care because they live as if "a life, lived or unlived, is not worth examining" (and especially one lived more than 2000 years ago, like the life of Socrates or Plato).
The tragedy is that such people, who see no need to pause and examine their own lives, get promoted at work as a reward for always seeming busy; then they get to decide how much work people like us should be able to complete before the deadlines which it's their job to set for us :-(
To quote my other favourite philosopher, Dilbert:
"I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by."
> Are you excited & enthusiastic about your work? That's the real test.
Being forced to be too busy can kill my excitement & enthusiasm about even the most interesting work.
It's 7 a.m. Friday for me and I'm 11 more sleepless hours from the deadline for some boring work which would have been fascinating if only I could have another week to think about it.
Life-examining Socratic break over -- back to busy :-(
Posted by Medusa on August 30, 2002, at 3:15:31
In reply to Busy seems to mask the boredom, posted by Heather66 on August 29, 2002, at 15:53:20
> planning a trip.... BY MYSELF
good for you. where you going? coming to Europe?
I only have fun on vacations when I'm alone. Or sometimes with my younger sibs - that's fun. But with DH, I feel inhibited, or we're visiting family and I'm uptight ... I haven't had a real vacation since I met him. As soon as I get a job, I'm going to plan a real vacation, maybe to a warm beach area. I hope alone. But I'll probably owe DH a good vacation ... dang.
Have fun on your vacation. do you plan things, or just wander around? the worst is getting to someplace beautiful and still being depressed.
M
Posted by Heather66 on September 3, 2002, at 13:12:26
In reply to vacation alone » Heather66, posted by Medusa on August 30, 2002, at 3:15:31
Thank you for asking about my vacation. I am going to Europe on a bike tour. Biking is very therapeutic to me - although sometimes when I am biking I think I have too much time to think about being sad. I try to focus my thoughts on other things. Sometimes I can. Sometimes I can't. I am very much looking forward to my trip and it is SO NICE to hear that someone thinks it takes a SPECIAL person. I am actually crying right now because I am extremely stressed out and got some bad news today. I hope my trip next week will cheer me up. I know I'm babbling now but I still really wish I had someone to go with me. I miss my ex-boyfriend (from three years ago) so much today. I am so mad that he can't go with me. The last bike tour I took was with him.
Posted by jane d on September 3, 2002, at 19:51:14
In reply to Re: vacation alone, posted by Heather66 on September 3, 2002, at 13:12:26
Heather,
I think it makes you special too. I've always wanted to go biking in Europe (or the US for that matter) but it somehow kept getting put off on that list of things to do when I felt better. Have a great time!
Is it a group tour or will you be riding alone?
Jane
Posted by Medusa on September 4, 2002, at 0:45:49
In reply to Re: vacation alone, posted by Heather66 on September 3, 2002, at 13:12:26
> I am going to Europe on a bike tour.
Mind if I ask where in Europe? How would you feel about finding people who would do day parts of your tour with you? (presuming you're going solo, not with a group)
>too much time to think about being sad.Oh boy. I passed one part of a bike trip just chanting the names of the next three towns I was headed through, to drown the noises in my head.
>I am extremely stressed out and got some bad
>news today.Sorry about that - I don't know what else to say.
>I still really wish I had someone to go with me.Well ... maybe a balance would be finding a few different persons to meet up with at certain points on your trip, so you wouldn't be entirely alone. Feel free to mail me at stopyerspam at yahoo dot fr - especially if you'll be in France or Germany for your trip, that's where I have the most contacts. Ah, I just thought of a contact in the UK, a women's cycling group, if you'll be there I can try to look her up again. I don't mean to be jumping in and fixing your frustrations - but if I can be of help, please let me know.
>I miss my ex-boyfriend (from three years ago)I get this one, too. Before I started dating DH, I was best friends with a guy who started out as my lifting buddy. I had met him through a real hound-dog of a mutual acquaintance, so I hadn't expected to get along, but I needed a workout buddy, and eventually we started talking and ended up doing a lot together. Depression eventually got in the way of that in a huge way, he had zero experience with it and I just couldn't handle any more contact. I guess this is not related to your situation - just saying, sometimes I really miss this guy, I hate going to the weights area of the gym alone, I haven't lifted weights seriously since him.
Well, sorry for rambling so much about me again.
Hoping your stress is easing,
M
Posted by heather66 on September 4, 2002, at 13:31:52
In reply to absolutely special! » Heather66, posted by Medusa on September 4, 2002, at 0:45:49
Thank you for your feedback. I will be a part of a small tour group. I don't know anyone else in the group, yet. I also sometimes chant something over and over again in my head while I am biking to stop thinking so much. Sometimes I count in French. un, deux, trois, etc.
Au Revoir!
I'll keep your email address for some other time. Merci Beaucoup!
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