![[dr. bob]](/dr-bob-sm.gif)
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by creature on February 1, 2002, at 23:33:17
update on Rick, my SO
wont know for sure until next wed when all test results are in, but its either
plasma cell leukemia or multiple Myeloma, both are forms of blood cancer, either way
he has to have chemo, also has to have 2 more infusions of blood in the
morning..just had 3 the other dayneither diagnosis is good, "The outlook for plasma cell leukemia is not good"
and for Myeloma "possibility that some treatments may bring complete remission"
I've lost too many ppl in my life, 3 deaths, a divorce, and the loss of my
mother (though alive she's not all there because of the brain tumor), my father
is dying too thats a mess because of what he did to me as childya know it's been one major catastrophe after another, each one topping the last
I am in no means exhatrting...(can't spell, i'm exhausted, i'm sobbing, and in
pain)
always hated Murphys law...fuck its truei'm trying...I REALLY AM
fuck, Rick shouldnt have to worry about me now
he needs to focus on healing, he needs to lean on meand Mom during all of this....that BITCH...told her she has to cancel her dentist appt today (only a teeth cleaning) because I needed to be with Rick
when he went to dr....she had a fit..it's my car, I should have it when I want
it (she can't drive any more)....not one word of, How is Rick holding up and how about you...then i just cracked up laughingand today when we got the news...I spent most of the day with Rick and called her in the late afternoon, she berated me....where have you been all day! i lost
it,screamed at her, jesus mom ...Rick has a life threatning illnessthen she calls me sister out of state who just got home from an operation and it's all, poor Ann...i love you so much, i wish i could be there to help
you, you're such a wonderful daughter, make sure you rest and eat well, you're recovery is the most important thingso she is capable of empathy...just not with me...WTF is that. WTF
i'm the one who's taken care of her for 2 yrs now
she also told me that I won't be in her will....1/2 is going to Ann, the other
will be spilit up between my daughtersi cant lose another person that I love
i cant i canrt i cantlynn
Posted by ST on February 2, 2002, at 4:26:32
In reply to we saw the dr., scary doesn't cover it, posted by creature on February 1, 2002, at 23:33:17
Wow. Your mom.....maybe she takes advantage of you because she feels she can. Maybe she needs someone to dump on and whether you realize or not, you make it safe for her to do it? I don't know! I guess you'd feel guilty if you started shutting her out, but after all, it's as if she's asking for it.
I don't know the whole situation: how old she is, if she's ill, etc., but you know, couldn't she take the bus?
Wait until you know what's up with Rick before you start conjuring scenarios. Doctors have been wrong before. Many people go in to remission. There ARE possibilities.
Sarah
> update on Rick, my SO
>
> wont know for sure until next wed when all test results are in, but its either
> plasma cell leukemia or multiple Myeloma, both are forms of blood cancer, either way
> he has to have chemo, also has to have 2 more infusions of blood in the
> morning..just had 3 the other day
>
> neither diagnosis is good, "The outlook for plasma cell leukemia is not good"
> and for Myeloma "possibility that some treatments may bring complete remission"
>
>
> I've lost too many ppl in my life, 3 deaths, a divorce, and the loss of my
> mother (though alive she's not all there because of the brain tumor), my father
> is dying too thats a mess because of what he did to me as child
>
> ya know it's been one major catastrophe after another, each one topping the last
> I am in no means exhatrting...(can't spell, i'm exhausted, i'm sobbing, and in
> pain)
> always hated Murphys law...fuck its true
>
> i'm trying...I REALLY AM
> fuck, Rick shouldnt have to worry about me now
> he needs to focus on healing, he needs to lean on me
>
> and Mom during all of this....that BITCH...told her she has to cancel her dentist appt today (only a teeth cleaning) because I needed to be with Rick
> when he went to dr....she had a fit..it's my car, I should have it when I want
> it (she can't drive any more)....not one word of, How is Rick holding up and how about you...then i just cracked up laughing
>
> and today when we got the news...I spent most of the day with Rick and called her in the late afternoon, she berated me....where have you been all day! i lost
> it,screamed at her, jesus mom ...Rick has a life threatning illness
>
> then she calls me sister out of state who just got home from an operation and it's all, poor Ann...i love you so much, i wish i could be there to help
> you, you're such a wonderful daughter, make sure you rest and eat well, you're recovery is the most important thing
>
> so she is capable of empathy...just not with me...WTF is that. WTF
> i'm the one who's taken care of her for 2 yrs now
> she also told me that I won't be in her will....1/2 is going to Ann, the other
> will be spilit up between my daughters
>
> i cant lose another person that I love
> i cant i canrt i cant
>
> lynn
Posted by NikkiT2 on February 2, 2002, at 14:05:34
In reply to we saw the dr., scary doesn't cover it, posted by creature on February 1, 2002, at 23:33:17
*gives you an enormous enormous hug*
I wish I could give you some great pearl of wisdom, but hang in there... we're ALL here for you when you need us...
Nikki xxx
> update on Rick, my SO
>
> wont know for sure until next wed when all test results are in, but its either
> plasma cell leukemia or multiple Myeloma, both are forms of blood cancer, either way
> he has to have chemo, also has to have 2 more infusions of blood in the
> morning..just had 3 the other day
>
> neither diagnosis is good, "The outlook for plasma cell leukemia is not good"
> and for Myeloma "possibility that some treatments may bring complete remission"
>
>
> I've lost too many ppl in my life, 3 deaths, a divorce, and the loss of my
> mother (though alive she's not all there because of the brain tumor), my father
> is dying too thats a mess because of what he did to me as child
>
> ya know it's been one major catastrophe after another, each one topping the last
> I am in no means exhatrting...(can't spell, i'm exhausted, i'm sobbing, and in
> pain)
> always hated Murphys law...fuck its true
>
> i'm trying...I REALLY AM
> fuck, Rick shouldnt have to worry about me now
> he needs to focus on healing, he needs to lean on me
>
> and Mom during all of this....that BITCH...told her she has to cancel her dentist appt today (only a teeth cleaning) because I needed to be with Rick
> when he went to dr....she had a fit..it's my car, I should have it when I want
> it (she can't drive any more)....not one word of, How is Rick holding up and how about you...then i just cracked up laughing
>
> and today when we got the news...I spent most of the day with Rick and called her in the late afternoon, she berated me....where have you been all day! i lost
> it,screamed at her, jesus mom ...Rick has a life threatning illness
>
> then she calls me sister out of state who just got home from an operation and it's all, poor Ann...i love you so much, i wish i could be there to help
> you, you're such a wonderful daughter, make sure you rest and eat well, you're recovery is the most important thing
>
> so she is capable of empathy...just not with me...WTF is that. WTF
> i'm the one who's taken care of her for 2 yrs now
> she also told me that I won't be in her will....1/2 is going to Ann, the other
> will be spilit up between my daughters
>
> i cant lose another person that I love
> i cant i canrt i cant
>
> lynn
Posted by tina on February 2, 2002, at 16:39:44
In reply to we saw the dr., scary doesn't cover it, posted by creature on February 1, 2002, at 23:33:17
Lynn
It's a horrible thought, but dump your mother. You need to focus on what's happening in your life and if your mom doesn't get that, the last thing you need is her intolerant, unsupportive rambling. I know you feel obligated to help her and you can if you wish but in this instant, right now, you need to be there for Rick and yourself. YOu can be there for your mom later when the situation is more tolerable. BUt right now, it's a huge blow and a massive change and emotional earthquake. Deal with that, not the illness yet. Just take that part and deal with it. Then take the illness on. Then take on your mother. Break it down into manageable lumps Lynn. Not all together. It's too overwhelming. One thing at a time. Minute by minute. Mom can wait. The actual leukemia can wait (not long I know) but you and Rick need to digest this and deal with it. THEN, take on the rest.
my thoughts are with you
Tina> update on Rick, my SO
>
> wont know for sure until next wed when all test results are in, but its either
> plasma cell leukemia or multiple Myeloma, both are forms of blood cancer, either way
> he has to have chemo, also has to have 2 more infusions of blood in the
> morning..just had 3 the other day
>
> neither diagnosis is good, "The outlook for plasma cell leukemia is not good"
> and for Myeloma "possibility that some treatments may bring complete remission"
>
>
> I've lost too many ppl in my life, 3 deaths, a divorce, and the loss of my
> mother (though alive she's not all there because of the brain tumor), my father
> is dying too thats a mess because of what he did to me as child
>
> ya know it's been one major catastrophe after another, each one topping the last
> I am in no means exhatrting...(can't spell, i'm exhausted, i'm sobbing, and in
> pain)
> always hated Murphys law...fuck its true
>
> i'm trying...I REALLY AM
> fuck, Rick shouldnt have to worry about me now
> he needs to focus on healing, he needs to lean on me
>
> and Mom during all of this....that BITCH...told her she has to cancel her dentist appt today (only a teeth cleaning) because I needed to be with Rick
> when he went to dr....she had a fit..it's my car, I should have it when I want
> it (she can't drive any more)....not one word of, How is Rick holding up and how about you...then i just cracked up laughing
>
> and today when we got the news...I spent most of the day with Rick and called her in the late afternoon, she berated me....where have you been all day! i lost
> it,screamed at her, jesus mom ...Rick has a life threatning illness
>
> then she calls me sister out of state who just got home from an operation and it's all, poor Ann...i love you so much, i wish i could be there to help
> you, you're such a wonderful daughter, make sure you rest and eat well, you're recovery is the most important thing
>
> so she is capable of empathy...just not with me...WTF is that. WTF
> i'm the one who's taken care of her for 2 yrs now
> she also told me that I won't be in her will....1/2 is going to Ann, the other
> will be spilit up between my daughters
>
> i cant lose another person that I love
> i cant i canrt i cant
>
> lynn
Posted by Kristi on February 2, 2002, at 19:09:12
In reply to Re: we saw the dr., One thing at a time, posted by tina on February 2, 2002, at 16:39:44
I totally agree with Tina here...... you have enough to worry about, your mom'll be fine..... if you have the strength to, make her last in your list of priorities. Rick, you, then her if you have time.
I have a mother who totally(well, not so much anymore) monopolizes my every move... and she sounds a lot like your mother. I'm in my mid-thirties... never shows an ounce of compassion, yet expects everything to be handed to her. My mom ruined me. In a lot of ways..... don't let her to that to you! You'll be better off.....
Hang in there..... I'm sorry your going thru all of this. Take care of yourself, Kristi> Lynn
> It's a horrible thought, but dump your mother. You need to focus on what's happening in your life and if your mom doesn't get that, the last thing you need is her intolerant, unsupportive rambling. I know you feel obligated to help her and you can if you wish but in this instant, right now, you need to be there for Rick and yourself. YOu can be there for your mom later when the situation is more tolerable. BUt right now, it's a huge blow and a massive change and emotional earthquake. Deal with that, not the illness yet. Just take that part and deal with it. Then take the illness on. Then take on your mother. Break it down into manageable lumps Lynn. Not all together. It's too overwhelming. One thing at a time. Minute by minute. Mom can wait. The actual leukemia can wait (not long I know) but you and Rick need to digest this and deal with it. THEN, take on the rest.
> my thoughts are with you
> Tina
>
> > update on Rick, my SO
> >
> > wont know for sure until next wed when all test results are in, but its either
> > plasma cell leukemia or multiple Myeloma, both are forms of blood cancer, either way
> > he has to have chemo, also has to have 2 more infusions of blood in the
> > morning..just had 3 the other day
> >
> > neither diagnosis is good, "The outlook for plasma cell leukemia is not good"
> > and for Myeloma "possibility that some treatments may bring complete remission"
> >
> >
> > I've lost too many ppl in my life, 3 deaths, a divorce, and the loss of my
> > mother (though alive she's not all there because of the brain tumor), my father
> > is dying too thats a mess because of what he did to me as child
> >
> > ya know it's been one major catastrophe after another, each one topping the last
> > I am in no means exhatrting...(can't spell, i'm exhausted, i'm sobbing, and in
> > pain)
> > always hated Murphys law...fuck its true
> >
> > i'm trying...I REALLY AM
> > fuck, Rick shouldnt have to worry about me now
> > he needs to focus on healing, he needs to lean on me
> >
> > and Mom during all of this....that BITCH...told her she has to cancel her dentist appt today (only a teeth cleaning) because I needed to be with Rick
> > when he went to dr....she had a fit..it's my car, I should have it when I want
> > it (she can't drive any more)....not one word of, How is Rick holding up and how about you...then i just cracked up laughing
> >
> > and today when we got the news...I spent most of the day with Rick and called her in the late afternoon, she berated me....where have you been all day! i lost
> > it,screamed at her, jesus mom ...Rick has a life threatning illness
> >
> > then she calls me sister out of state who just got home from an operation and it's all, poor Ann...i love you so much, i wish i could be there to help
> > you, you're such a wonderful daughter, make sure you rest and eat well, you're recovery is the most important thing
> >
> > so she is capable of empathy...just not with me...WTF is that. WTF
> > i'm the one who's taken care of her for 2 yrs now
> > she also told me that I won't be in her will....1/2 is going to Ann, the other
> > will be spilit up between my daughters
> >
> > i cant lose another person that I love
> > i cant i canrt i cant
> >
> > lynn
This is the end of the thread.
Psycho-Babble Social | Extras | FAQ
Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.org
Script revised: February 4, 2008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/cgi-bin/pb/mget.pl
Copyright 2006-17 Robert Hsiung.
Owned and operated by Dr. Bob LLC and not the University of Chicago.