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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by geekUK on July 17, 2001, at 19:29:15
This is a follow to last week,
I have desisions. maybe longterm.
1.Continue building debts and do a 1/2 arsed job of looking 4 job. broke and alone for 14 hrs a day.
2.Go back to my dads and sleep it off.(note-Severely dislike dad and dad severe depressed/scary)-also have friends there.
3.Go 2 Hospital (1st time)if they will let me and then have to go to dads. This could destabilise dad as I am the 'sane one'i.e.keeps himself to himselves. scared may not come out/not do any good.
I am as indesisive as a person who cant deside what to put as an indecisive reference.
Any advise would be greated with open ears
MC
Posted by mila on July 17, 2001, at 22:36:58
In reply to rock+hardplace, fryingpan+fire- sit. rep., posted by geekUK on July 17, 2001, at 19:29:15
Hi MC,
I do not have any advice for you, you are in a difficult situation, really. but if i had it would be something like that:
do something you care about, if possible, with abandonment ( you can write a long post here about something too). It doesn't have to be about you. Distract yourself for a while. Maybe after such a timeout the decision will be clearer in your mind.
You have to see the outcome of your decision more clearly. Right now it is mostly about "being alone or being with wrong people". Imagine something else. HINT: 'being in a company of good people' :)
I wish you well. I believe you can get better and you will.
best,
mila
Posted by sar on July 18, 2001, at 0:17:52
In reply to rock+hardplace, fryingpan+fire- sit. rep., posted by geekUK on July 17, 2001, at 19:29:15
Dear GeekUK,
I suggest going to the hospital--let *them* figure out whats wrong. i used to be so anit-medicine 'til i tried prozac + klonopin! sometimes i feel so fucking fantastic that i wonder whats wrong w/ me.
go to the hospital.. i've been reading yr posts, and it seems the appropriate decision to me. no need to sit there + suffer when there is help available. anti-depressants, IMO, are great man. What is your diagnosis?
good luck to you,
sar
Posted by dreamer on July 18, 2001, at 1:50:18
In reply to rock+hardplace, fryingpan+fire- sit. rep., posted by geekUK on July 17, 2001, at 19:29:15
Sounds a tangled mess.
I can,t give much advise but I will say give up trying to decide what to do , chasing yer tail just getting mentally dizzy talk to someone in psychiatric hospital you can just walk in you don't have to commit yourself, someone will help.
Don't go in pissed they'll percieve you as being a threat.
Social workers can do some good.
What area of london are you living?/you don't have to say . Here in SE it's relatively easy to get help straight away.
If you need me to help let me know,no strings or friendship bonding necessary.
Posted by dreamer on July 18, 2001, at 7:40:21
In reply to Re: rock+hardplace, fryingpan+fire- sit. rep. » geekUK, posted by dreamer on July 18, 2001, at 1:50:18
> Sounds a tangled mess.
> I can,t give much advise but I will say give up trying to decide what to do , chasing yer tail just getting mentally dizzy talk to someone in psychiatric hospital you can just walk in you don't have to commit yourself, someone will help.
> Don't go in pissed they'll percieve you as being a threat.
> Social workers can do some good.
> What area of london are you living?/you don't have to say . Here in SE it's relatively easy to get help straight away.
> If you need me to help let me know,no strings or friendship bonding necessary.Looks like I may have to help myself I'm on way down and a letter I recieved from my mad parent whom I've been trying to bury hasn't helped . Such anger wells up + why at a most vunerable time and is it national gaddam DIY day I'm surrounded by noise.
Take care if possible,nothing helps does it
Posted by geekUK on July 19, 2001, at 5:32:05
In reply to Re: rock+hardplace, fryingpan+fire- sit. rep., posted by mila on July 17, 2001, at 22:36:58
I will try to get myhead into something else for a while, but you know its hard to think of a single thing that I want to do, exept get drunk! I thibk that you are probably right in that I need to consider the posivies from each rather than negatives. having my freinds aroundme might seem little use but it probably would help.
thanx mc> Hi MC,
>
> I do not have any advice for you, you are in a difficult situation, really. but if i had it would be something like that:
>
> do something you care about, if possible, with abandonment ( you can write a long post here about something too). It doesn't have to be about you. Distract yourself for a while. Maybe after such a timeout the decision will be clearer in your mind.
>
> You have to see the outcome of your decision more clearly. Right now it is mostly about "being alone or being with wrong people". Imagine something else. HINT: 'being in a company of good people' :)
>
> I wish you well. I believe you can get better and you will.
>
> best,
> mila
Posted by geekUK on July 19, 2001, at 5:35:55
In reply to Re: rock+hardplace, fryingpan+fire- sit. rep., posted by sar on July 18, 2001, at 0:17:52
no diagnosis, not for a lack of my insistance mind. I have never been anti med until last winter, when desided that no drug not even asprin would enter my body. then crashed and piled on the pharmacy. I have tryed a lot of ssri's to no avail, send me spinning.
MC
> Dear GeekUK,
>
> I suggest going to the hospital--let *them* figure out whats wrong. i used to be so anit-medicine 'til i tried prozac + klonopin! sometimes i feel so fucking fantastic that i wonder whats wrong w/ me.
>
> go to the hospital.. i've been reading yr posts, and it seems the appropriate decision to me. no need to sit there + suffer when there is help available. anti-depressants, IMO, are great man. What is your diagnosis?
>
> good luck to you,
> sar
Posted by geekUK on July 19, 2001, at 6:23:34
In reply to Re: rock+hardplace, fryingpan+fire- sit. rep. » dreamer, posted by dreamer on July 18, 2001, at 7:40:21
Heya,
I have called my therapist, under the pretence of reseduling apointment, she should ring some time today. Disscussion with a prof. is probably a good idea. I live close to the city area,It probably is easy for me to get help but I tend to hold my head between my knees and wait for the storm to pass. Read about your letter, its a pain and it always will happen at a bad time (sods law, every reaction, ie bad feeling, will have an equal and opposite reaction ie good mood demanded). My mother will always ring at the time when I cant get out of bed. When your in a low mood its hard to talk to freinds, letalone a parent that you havent spoken to in 6-8 months. you have had alot of advise on the post so I probably am providing an echo. follow your conciounce (SP),try to deside how much you need her and how much you like her, being aware of a big bias for your current feeling. I use this method a lot, letting my actions be chosen by littlest guilt. I guess I am twisted too much to the light side, damn religious indoctrination.
sorry I am kind of ramblingand not making concise points....hmm. My dad, as I have said before I dont really like, (this does connect to the conciuons bit). Until I was about 8-9(?) he was an alcoholic and used to beat my mum up. the worst times were when I was before 3, times I can claim to, and to a large extent, not remember. After this I can claim to be unaware quite well. the problem comes that my dad, inso many words admitted this on the phone. Therefore I cannot claim ignorance, So I feel I should tear the guy apart. Even if I do this mentaly he would probably die by (not my) his hand, this is bad as he needs to look out for my sister. This is compounded by the fact that during a long running divorce case my dad all but forced me and my sister to testify against my mum on this point. my consionce (I really cant do that word) tells me i am f@ckt.
I think I understand you on the trouble f'ed up parents can bring. but I cant giv any advise as i have no idea how to deal with mine. -past my christian beacon. I did write a separate post on your letter but lost it in the electronic graveyard. I remember ending it with something like ' the love of a parent isn't always unconditional, but the love of a child is'.
I guess these are the tests of a born again athiest.
MC> > Sounds a tangled mess.
> > I can,t give much advise but I will say give up trying to decide what to do , chasing yer tail just getting mentally dizzy talk to someone in psychiatric hospital you can just walk in you don't have to commit yourself, someone will help.
> > Don't go in pissed they'll percieve you as being a threat.
> > Social workers can do some good.
> > What area of london are you living?/you don't have to say . Here in SE it's relatively easy to get help straight away.
> > If you need me to help let me know,no strings or friendship bonding necessary.
>
> Looks like I may have to help myself I'm on way down and a letter I recieved from my mad parent whom I've been trying to bury hasn't helped . Such anger wells up + why at a most vunerable time and is it national gaddam DIY day I'm surrounded by noise.
> Take care if possible,nothing helps does it
Posted by kid_A on July 19, 2001, at 9:31:50
In reply to Re: rock+hardplace, fryingpan+fire- sit. rep. » mila, posted by geekUK on July 19, 2001, at 5:32:05
> I will try to get myhead into something else for a while, but you know its hard to think of a single thing that I want to do, exept get drunk!
And whats wrong w/ getting drunk? Oh yeah, that, I guess its not that constructive... lets be selfish though, lets look after ourselves... I was in London two weeks ago for about 12 days, wish I woulda known you, we could have had a pint or ten... On the way home I had the worst hangover in the world from having drunk 7 carlings the night b4 at a pub in Victoria where I was staying... whats the point of this long and meandering story, well on the way to the airport on the Gatwick "express" express!? it goes about 15 miles per hour.... old grans and people in wheelchairs could be seen along side of it speeding past... (ps. love the view of Batersea Park... Pink Floyd "Animals" !!!!) anywho... I was still sick as a dog and even after taking two xanax which smoothed me out some, a felt a wave of sickness come upon me... The way I got rid of it was I closed my eyes tightly and repeated the mantra "I am a calm blue ocean" over and over... In a few minutes the sickness was gone and I could feel better... I must have looked the freak to the other passengers... Black + copper haired punk w/ jean jacket and radiohead shirt meditating to himself... Anyways, my point is to just relax as best you can and take time to think clearly about what the best decision is *for you* what makes *you* the most happy... Be selfish of course, and think *only* of yourself.
Remember, everyone says what they do is right.
Posted by geekUK on July 19, 2001, at 11:30:48
In reply to Re: rock+hardplace, fryingpan+fire- sit. rep. » geekUK, posted by kid_A on July 19, 2001, at 9:31:50
There is only one thing wrong with getting drunk in my opinion, it costs cash and I am that poor!
well spoke to therapist and desided to meet tuesday, plus pact and the usual advise on points of call. feel quite chirpy today for some reason. maybe to talk it out hepled. umm....yeah it seemed she was siding on hospital, as she neve refered to my hometown but was talking of going 'somewhere' to get out of the situation.......I didn't have the guts to sugest it. so they may be coming to take me away (haha),
MC
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