Psycho-Babble Administration Thread 493

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Re: I leaving....Bye ! » stjames

Posted by Neal on February 1, 2001, at 0:31:04

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

James: If you ride off into the sunset, who's gonna be the reality check? . . . . At least stop by once in while and let us know how you're doin . . . Bye for now . . -Neal

 

Re: I leaving....Bye ! Stick around » stjames

Posted by kazoo on February 1, 2001, at 1:15:19

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

> Some things have pushed me over the top. Kazoo has a past of posting clearly wrong information or advice that was poorly thought out and I have corrected him.
> Do not assume this is ego;

^^^^^^^^

Martyrdom doesn't become you, James.

I sincerely wish you would reconsider returning to the group: you're a formidable force to be reckoned with, and, yes, I confess, you *do* know your stuff, and you know it well. There are many who look to you, if not look *up* to you, for the kind of personable help they cannot get from a physician. Think of the disservice, not to mention hurt, you'll do to them, myself included. You may believe this or not, but I, for one, will miss you also. I say these things only because I believe them to be true: am I not correct?

Lastly, thank you for correcting me when I was wrong: I've learned, and a better person from it.

kazoo

 

Re: I leaving....Bye ! » stjames

Posted by NikkiT2 on February 1, 2001, at 4:15:13

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

Our dear Saintly james...

Well, I have been having similar feelings to you (and I haven't read the replies, so I may be epeating stuff!) but, hey, I'm gona miss ya!!!

Could you maybe, if you feel here isn't the right place for you, come and give our little safe haven a try??? Go on... ;) Its at www.hroups.yahoo.com and is called ASafeHaven...

If not, hope things can only improve for you. You've always been a nice breath of fersh air here, and I look forward to reading your posts, so please know that you've made people smile in your time here ~smile~

Take care dude...

Nikki xx

 

Re: I leaving....Bye !

Posted by NikkiT2 on February 1, 2001, at 4:19:56

In reply to Re: I leaving....Bye ! » stjames, posted by Cam W. on February 1, 2001, at 0:01:17

What a truly wonderful post to james... You've got me all tearful at work!!! :o) How wonderful for someone to care like that about someone else...

N xx

 

Re: I leaving....Bye !

Posted by Lisa Simpson on February 1, 2001, at 6:59:27

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

Dear James

I'm not such a regular poster as the other guys up here - I have so many problems of my own which I can't deal with, that I don't feel "qualified" to add much of my own suggestions here! But you have answered some of my needed questions in the past, and I read all of the things you have posted here, which I always think are very good. I am very sorry you have decided to leave - the board will be a reduced place because of it.

All my good wishes.

Lisa

 

Re: I leaving....Bye !

Posted by allisonm on February 1, 2001, at 7:48:31

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

James,

I'm very sorry to see you leave, but understand completely.
I'll miss your presence and your posts. You've been a great help in my own struggle and I will always be grateful.
Thank you!!!

Take care,
Allison

 

Re: I leaving....Bye !

Posted by Noa on February 1, 2001, at 8:06:42

In reply to Re: I leaving....Bye !, posted by allisonm on February 1, 2001, at 7:48:31

James,

I, too, consider you one of the "must reads" when I come to babble. I trust you; you have been a steady force here, a reliable source of information and good sense.

Of course, I share some of the frustrations you mention, too.

I do hope you'll stop in from time to time. And consider Nikki's invite seriously.

Take good care of yourself. You have been such a great role model to me and others here.

Be well.

 

Re: I leaving....Bye !

Posted by Greg on February 1, 2001, at 8:09:12

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

James,

When I came to Babble for the first time about a year and a half ago, you answered my very first post. I've always remembered and appreciated that. Although we haven't communicated much since, you have been one of the posters here that I always read. Thank you for your input, both directly and indirectly. I hope you'll always know what a valued member of this community you are.

I wish you health, I wish you well, and happiness galore.

I wish you luck for you and friends; what could I wish you more?

May your joys be as deep as the oceans, your troubles as light as its foam.

And may you find, sweet peace of mind, where ever you may roam.

Greg

 

Re: I leaving....Bye !

Posted by willow on February 1, 2001, at 8:15:59

In reply to Re: I leaving....Bye ! » stjames, posted by Cam W. on February 1, 2001, at 0:01:17

st james

I do follow your links and then go searching for other stuff from info in them. I wish you luck in your job search. Let us know when you score!

 

Re: I leaving....bye stjames...

Posted by Deb R on February 1, 2001, at 8:37:06

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

"Where ever life may lead you,
Which ever path you take,
May good fortune never leave you
Nor happiness forsake"

My Grandma wrote that in my autograph book when I was a kid..only a few months before she died. I wish this for you James, thanks for everything.

Love,
Deb.

 

Re: I leaving....Bye ! » NikkiT2

Posted by Cam W. on February 1, 2001, at 10:18:21

In reply to Re: I leaving....Bye !, posted by NikkiT2 on February 1, 2001, at 4:19:56

Nik - James (or little Jimmy-whimmy, to some of us - that'll get him to post at least once more) is a special person and this is what prompted me to think about what to write to him, instead of my usual off-the-top-of-my-head crap that I usually post (You know, the stuff that usually gets me into trouble).

Now, get back to work, dammit or I'll have speak to your boss and you'll be collecting dole.

TTFN - Cam


> What a truly wonderful post to james... You've got me all tearful at work!!! :o) How wonderful for someone to care like that about someone else...
>
> N xx

 

Re: I leaving....Bye ! » Cam W.

Posted by judy1 on February 1, 2001, at 13:05:30

In reply to Re: I leaving....Bye ! » NikkiT2, posted by Cam W. on February 1, 2001, at 10:18:21

I'll have to second Nikki's comment, that was a very special post to James. You sounded really healthy and peaceful which made me happy for you. I hope James can reach a similar place, the two of you have always been a tremendous help to me, whether I showed it or not. Take care and blessings- judy

 

Re: I leaving....Bye ! » stjames

Posted by ksvt on February 1, 2001, at 17:56:58

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

>James - I think you answered one of my first posts also. Your frequent observation that the information I was seeking was easier for me to find than I assumed, was your wise way, I think, of reminding us that we all have to take responsibility for our own recoveries. I'm grateful for the message and for your willingness to take the time to give it as patiently as you have. Good luck and please do check in now and then. ksvt

PS - Like Shar, I'm also really going to miss the phrase "James here."


I feel it is time for me to leave. Some of it has to do with work, which the last month got really sticky. I have been on Atavin daily. A quick check o the market indicates I am way under paid so I am really mad that i did not do this sooner.
>
> In general I don't have critisimisms of the board, it is more that my needs are not being met. Also there seems an endless amount of hurting people out there
> and the same questions get asked again and again. (Again this is not a crit; people do need info and it is great they can come here, but this boars me after a while. I also have some real life friends who need me more at present and this board is eating up my compassion i need to have for them.
>
> Some things have pushed me over the top. Kazoo has a past of posting clearly wrong information or advice that was poorly thought out and I have corrected him.
> Do not assume this is ego; I am very conserned that info presented here is correct. I have made some gafs, too. He then insults me. Once is fine, twice is pushing it but I feel he should of been banned the last time. The info in his post was so easy to debunk
> on the internet. Yes I did accept his appology, it is the civil thing to do.
>
> I found R.Anne to be very hostle and the issue was over well held facts. She asked me to prove them; my conclusion was that it would be better to find a place where there was no need to debate well held facts. I can debate for hours and never let it get personal. I feel I will do better posting where others have the same mind set. It is not fun to simply disagree and then get attacked.
>
> I get very frustrated when people say things like "if it is long or has a lot of links I ignore it" I like to exchange info, I post a lot here and it seems like few use it. I have found a place where there is more info exchange both ways and will spend more time there.
>
> The overseas med thing, without a docs input, conserns me. Some of the questions indicate some will try anything and don't have a good grasp of the medical issues. When the same person asks many questions daily
> I cannot help but think they have not done enough work on their own.
>
> I am also conserned about the negative influance of Name on folks that are functioning poorly and don't have my skills to see through what he/she posts. To many are already shaky about trust issues and Name has made his point (I'm all for that) but enough is enough.
>
> I would not change anything on the list. That is not the point of this post. My needs have changed. I have done very well on meds for 16 yrs and the constant pleas of more hurting people is begining to effect me.
> I learned a long time ago that many will ask for help but few will do anything. Too many persons don't answer my questions (always the big ones). This is not a crit, more a fact of life that I accept. i need to concentrate one myself at present and family (real life) that needs my help and is really willing the change.
>
> I have been here ~2 years and was very florid in posting, so if you would like to know what "StJames would say about this" the archives will answer your
> questions. In a pinch, if it is not in the archives, ask Cam or Racer to get my opinion. Racer is so cool and is the ONLY person from the net that has my home phone #, even after being on the net for 10 yrs. That really says something about her ! Cam is such a great person, there are few people from the net I want to meet in person, Cam is one of them. Dr. Bob is, too, and Racer. I have a 4WD Jeep and have always wanted to see the Arouras and our neighbors to the north, so who knows. I would love to go see Racer but Calif has bad connitations for me, I used to know so many wonderful people there but they are now dead from AIDS in the 1980's, partly because Regan did not mention AIDS anytime in his term. If my friends would have known eariler that unsafe sex was killing them they might be alive. At least I was younger then these friends and got this info so i am negative.
>
> Opps, way off track ! 2 nd Atavin is kicking it ! I said "bye" in the subject, which seems to final. How about this:
>
> Aufwiedersen
> James
>

 

Re: I leaving....Bye ! » stjames

Posted by shellie on February 1, 2001, at 20:32:03

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

James, I am sorry that in your post to say that you are leaving, you felt the need to bring a few people down before you left. I think it would have shown a lot more class on your part to have not done so. Nevertheless, I wish you success and happiness in your life. Shellie

 

Re: I leaving....Bye ! » stjames

Posted by Lexie on February 1, 2001, at 20:41:10

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

James

I am sorry to see you go. You don't realize but I will never forget what you said to me on 09/04/2000, when I asked when it was time to give up. Life has been a struggle for me but I often think back to the words you told me:

When is it time to give up ? NEVER ! Squeeze the flask of life to its dregs. Bipolar is well known
for being tricky to treat, it seems to take much longer to find what works. You are worth the wait.

It was nice to know that someone thought I was worth something. Thank you, Lexie

 

Re: I leaving....Bye ! » shellie

Posted by Cam W. on February 1, 2001, at 23:16:20

In reply to Re: I leaving....Bye ! » stjames, posted by shellie on February 1, 2001, at 20:32:03

... you felt the need to bring a few people down before you left. I think it would have shown a lot more class on your part...

Shellie - I believe that your remarks spoke volumes about the metamorphosis of this website, especially over the last year. In a few sentences it summed up James' decision to leave and a few of the reason behind his actions.

I do not understand America's obsession with political correctness. If more people spoke their minds', instead of obscuring their feelings and opinions to the point of incomprehensibility, I believe that more situations would be better understood and fewer misunderstandings would occur.

In this case, James was registering his frustration over the changes that have occurred on this board recently. He succinctly stated his reasons for leaving, rather than leaving us to guess who had caused him his discomfort and why. I don't think he felt an obligation to do this; but did it out of respect for those of us he is leaving behind.

The people he referred to were not "brought down" by his naming them, nor by stating their perceived transgressions, but James explained to them and us just how they truly made him feel through their actions and words. This is not to say that these people's actions and words were any less valid than James' perception of them. They were differing opinions of a set of events. Kazoo even reiterated this. He was not offended by James' remarks, but accepted them. At the same time Kazoo did not retract what he had said, nor he should have to, being that his perception of the event is as valid as James'. No fault, no blame, just two adults stating their case.

I sincerely doubt that Kazoo or R.Anne were James' main reason for leaving. They were just two examples of the change that has occurred on this website over the past year. I believe that I know James well enough to say that these 2 people were not meant to be scapegoats for his leaving, but, as I have stated, examples of the changes.

These changes have occurred because of the popularity of the site and the larger readership and posters (and probably several other valid considerations). Many good people have become aware of the merits of this website and have joined in discussions, offered treatment theories, and learned by "ghosting" (as one person I know calls lurking. Rik reads regularily, but feels he does not have the skills to participate in the discussions - you're wrong buddy, you have a lot that you could contribute, for you are one astute character). Along with increased popularity come the inevitable egoists, proselytizers, those with agendas, those who aim to disrupt or hurt others, flamers and frauds. These cannot be easily stopped, but Dr.Bob does manage to keep most of them out.

IMHO - James has far more class than I ever expect to have. Sincerely - Cam

P.S. Shellie, I am not saying that your perception of James' post is wrong, but it is your perception and not mine. That, we can agree upon. - Cam

 

Re: I leaving....Bye ! » Cam W.

Posted by shellie on February 1, 2001, at 23:53:08

In reply to Re: I leaving....Bye ! » shellie, posted by Cam W. on February 1, 2001, at 23:16:20


Cam, I've been coming to this board for 3/4 of a year, and even reading back beyond that there have been complaints about how things used to be better. Maybe, participating enthusiastically on a board such as this is time limited. Or perhaps it's like a really good television series: after the first couple of seasons, the program usually cannot sustain its excellence.
>
As far as my comments to James, I don't find it surprising or alarming that you don't agree. But please don't attribute my opinions to political correctness. I didn't find James politically incorrect in his post; merely offensive. And if political correctness was important to me, I wouldn't have written my post at all; after a list of we'll miss you James, I didn't anticipate my comments to be particularly well received, but I said what I felt. Peace (really), Shellie

 

Re: I leaving....Bye !

Posted by Dr. Bob on February 2, 2001, at 1:19:05

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

> In general I don't have critisimisms of the board, it is more that my needs are not being met. Also there seems an endless amount of hurting people out there

Bob here... :-)

Thanks for all the feedback. You do have to be careful to take care of yourself and not to burn out. So this is setting a good example, too.

> I have been here ~2 years and was very florid in posting

Thanks for sticking with us for so long, you've helped a lot of people -- and the community as a whole. Best wishes,

Bob

 

Re: I leaving....Bye ! » shellie

Posted by Cam W. on February 2, 2001, at 6:57:27

In reply to Re: I leaving....Bye ! » Cam W., posted by shellie on February 1, 2001, at 23:53:08

Shelley -That's cool. I reread what I post and it didn't come out right. I was trying to rationalize why we were losing such a great guy. Again, my feelings don't come out in my words properly(or is it that my words didn't portray what I really felt toward your post or James'). I meant no harm with the P.C. thing either; it was just on my mind, at the time.

I think that your television analogy is bang-on (and probably closer to the truth than many of us would care to admit - ie. you mean that I actually buy into the "fast food society" thing", too - sigh).

Keep on postin' - Cam

 

Re: I leaving....Bye !

Posted by mars on February 3, 2001, at 2:35:32

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

james, i believe i was a bit of an ass in replying to several of your posts. i apologize. you are one of those people i most admired when i started looking at the board, and i will miss your presence.

mars

> I feel it is time for me to leave. Some of it has to do with work, which the last month got really sticky. I have been on Atavin daily. A quick check o the market indicates I am way under paid so I am really mad that i did not do this sooner.
>
> In general I don't have critisimisms of the board, it is more that my needs are not being met. Also there seems an endless amount of hurting people out there
> and the same questions get asked again and again. (Again this is not a crit; people do need info and it is great they can come here, but this boars me after a while. I also have some real life friends who need me more at present and this board is eating up my compassion i need to have for them.
>
> Some things have pushed me over the top. Kazoo has a past of posting clearly wrong information or advice that was poorly thought out and I have corrected him.
> Do not assume this is ego; I am very conserned that info presented here is correct. I have made some gafs, too. He then insults me. Once is fine, twice is pushing it but I feel he should of been banned the last time. The info in his post was so easy to debunk
> on the internet. Yes I did accept his appology, it is the civil thing to do.
>
> I found R.Anne to be very hostle and the issue was over well held facts. She asked me to prove them; my conclusion was that it would be better to find a place where there was no need to debate well held facts. I can debate for hours and never let it get personal. I feel I will do better posting where others have the same mind set. It is not fun to simply disagree and then get attacked.
>
> I get very frustrated when people say things like "if it is long or has a lot of links I ignore it" I like to exchange info, I post a lot here and it seems like few use it. I have found a place where there is more info exchange both ways and will spend more time there.
>
> The overseas med thing, without a docs input, conserns me. Some of the questions indicate some will try anything and don't have a good grasp of the medical issues. When the same person asks many questions daily
> I cannot help but think they have not done enough work on their own.
>
> I am also conserned about the negative influance of Name on folks that are functioning poorly and don't have my skills to see through what he/she posts. To many are already shaky about trust issues and Name has made his point (I'm all for that) but enough is enough.
>
> I would not change anything on the list. That is not the point of this post. My needs have changed. I have done very well on meds for 16 yrs and the constant pleas of more hurting people is begining to effect me.
> I learned a long time ago that many will ask for help but few will do anything. Too many persons don't answer my questions (always the big ones). This is not a crit, more a fact of life that I accept. i need to concentrate one myself at present and family (real life) that needs my help and is really willing the change.
>
> I have been here ~2 years and was very florid in posting, so if you would like to know what "StJames would say about this" the archives will answer your
> questions. In a pinch, if it is not in the archives, ask Cam or Racer to get my opinion. Racer is so cool and is the ONLY person from the net that has my home phone #, even after being on the net for 10 yrs. That really says something about her ! Cam is such a great person, there are few people from the net I want to meet in person, Cam is one of them. Dr. Bob is, too, and Racer. I have a 4WD Jeep and have always wanted to see the Arouras and our neighbors to the north, so who knows. I would love to go see Racer but Calif has bad connitations for me, I used to know so many wonderful people there but they are now dead from AIDS in the 1980's, partly because Regan did not mention AIDS anytime in his term. If my friends would have known eariler that unsafe sex was killing them they might be alive. At least I was younger then these friends and got this info so i am negative.
>
> Opps, way off track ! 2 nd Atavin is kicking it ! I said "bye" in the subject, which seems to final. How about this:
>
> Aufwiedersen
> James
>

 

Re: I leaving....Bye !

Posted by Phil on February 3, 2001, at 7:45:09

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

James, Thanks for all your help and common sense advice. Change can be good but I personally hope to see you back somewhere down the road.

Vaya con Dios,

Phil

 

Hasta la vista

Posted by R.Anne on February 4, 2001, at 18:15:20

In reply to I leaving....Bye !, posted by stjames on January 31, 2001, at 22:40:27

So, I disagreed with you. Apparently my views differ from yours. It hurt me the way you wrote to me calling me hostile from one thing I said. I am not hostile but your posts to me have felt intimidating. Has my point of view ever been acknowlegded by you? I wish you would stop judging me already (the harsh hostility judgement you keep giving me). Maybe I felt annoyed by some of your posts but I haven't judged you as you have judged me. I do not appreciate that. You seem to be obsessing about me already. You really don't know me at all and I wish you'd keep your judgements about me to yourself. I feel hurt. :-( Best wishes that you rest well anyways. Good luck and I hope you refresh yourself. :-)

 

Re: Hasta la vista ** You forgot '...,baby'! » R.Anne

Posted by kazoo on February 5, 2001, at 1:39:57

In reply to Hasta la vista, posted by R.Anne on February 4, 2001, at 18:15:20

> So, I disagreed with you. Apparently my views differ from yours. It hurt me the way you wrote to me calling me hostile from one thing I said. I am not hostile but your posts to me have felt intimidating. Has my point of view ever been acknowlegded by you? I wish you would stop judging me already (the harsh hostility judgement you keep giving me). Maybe I felt annoyed by some of your posts but I haven't judged you as you have judged me. I do not appreciate that. You seem to be obsessing about me already. You really don't know me at all and I wish you'd keep your judgements about me to yourself. I feel hurt. :-( Best wishes that you rest well anyways. Good luck and I hope you refresh yourself. :-)

^^^^^^^^^^^
Greetz to R.Anne:
Hear! Hear! My dear!
Which side of the boat would you like to row?
I'm sure you can understand why I need to ask this.
(a condemned) kazoo
:0

 

Good-bye, Shellie, Cam, Dr. Bob » shellie

Posted by R.Anne on February 5, 2001, at 23:08:05

In reply to Re: I leaving....Bye ! » Cam W., posted by shellie on February 1, 2001, at 23:53:08

Thanks so much Shellie for your defense-I do appreciate it. I agree with you and I did feel offended and hurt by the things you stated(that James wrote). I am a sensitive woman, like you, and that's a good thing if I may say so. Not to be weird but I luv ya for that, sincerely. :-)

Cam,
You are a pharmacist and very intelligent and book-smart, but you need to look at the feelings side of things and get off that soapbox of people saying what they feel when it is hurtful and incorrect. When you were getting email from people saying what they felt and that was offensive, your feelings were hurt because you knew they were g.damn wrong. And I truly felt bad for what you were going through but said nothing [because I was not in the "in group" here and was afraid to say anything at the time.] I have not been supported much at all as you have been here. Shellie has been a breath of fresh air to me today and her words of support made my day as I lost a good friend today-my good buddy died. Sorry to use the example I used regarding your life and again, sorry. But I want you to know I have feelings and hope you feel what I do at this moment. I want you to know how I feel and I know what you felt before.:(

I have felt like an outsider here and been thrown aside like my words meant nothing to anyone. I was very supportive and stayed up many nights answering troubled posters because I felt where they were coming from and worried about them, too.
I have a lot of education,too, like you (maybe more)but have been ignored mostly (maybe I'm culturally different). I am assertive and stand up for myself but I don't need to keep knocking someone down over and over. James has not let up on me and could have used different terms toward me. And after he downed me others started. Or so it really seemed and yes, I felt very hurt and alone and frankly, frightened. I think you are adding fuel to the James' fire. I was and am offended and you are wrong if the words you used are describing me-and you don't know me the least bit. Feelings, Cam, think about it good and hard and please don't jump on me right away like you did to Shellie. Think, think, think. I think, Cam, that you could use therapy, too, (like we ALL do)and this is not meant as an insult. I have read many of your posts and I think you could use good help-you are suffering, my man, and so am I.
Get into your feelings and you will see others feelings as well. Not to say that you NEVER are into feelings-there are just some you are ignoring. There is more than one side to the story as in every story.

Lastly, I am not coming back here because this place does not make me feel welcome any more. There seems to be a popular clique here and I never fit into them anyhow. Oh well, I'll go elsewhere and no big deal either.

I never asked for thanks nor do I want it but I gave my heart and soul here just like many others.

Dr. Bob, Shellie,
Goodbye and good luck.:@) Thanks for letting me know I matter.

 

Re: Hasta la vista ** You forgot '...,baby'! » kazoo

Posted by R.Anne on February 5, 2001, at 23:11:17

In reply to Re: Hasta la vista ** You forgot '...,baby'! » R.Anne, posted by kazoo on February 5, 2001, at 1:39:57


> Greetz to R.Anne:
> Hear! Hear! My dear!
> Which side of the boat would you like to row?
> I'm sure you can understand why I need to ask this.
> (a condemned) kazoo
> :0

Dear Kazoo,
I don't know, I am drowning tonight in sorrow. Thanks for thinking of me. Luyya, too. Best wishes, bye-bye. :(


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