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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 25. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Phil on July 21, 2003, at 13:28:57
Racer, you posted the Xanax thing on my 50th birthday. I'm very happy to see you're still kicking.
I've been thinking some pretty bad thoughts myself but I've already told everyone here that I would never commit suicide. Plus, you know, Texas may get PowerBall this year so I'm sure I'll win that jackpot out of the 200,000,000 entries.
I'll send you a 20 spot...okay $100.00.
I haven't met your breasts but my chest has had a lot to do with my depression. I have pectus excavatum which has kept me from many very fun social gatherings. I never had anyone when I was young, tell me that you know, you're unique and people will love you the way you are and all those lies. So, all the problems in my life kind of began at puberty which coincided with my mom becoming a full blown alcoholic. My nickname is Lucky.
Anyway, the most important thing right now is getting back on your feet and moving on. You are a very loved person here. I know you'll be okay. I will too. I haven't found a way to look good when I'm dead. I want to get cremated because I don't want whoever shows up at my funeral not to see me with my game face on.
I've yet to see a mortician do a decent job. Sure, the person is dead, but I bet those Hollywood people could pull it off.
If anyone's feelings are a bit raw, I write this stuff to keep myself sane, not to offend, it's just a story.
Racer, I'll try to stick around because I now know thay I serve a very important mission here. Others look at my posts and say, 'But for the grace of God, there goes I.'
You've survived worse Racer..let's stick around, get real old and piss the young drivers off.
Posted by tina on July 21, 2003, at 14:39:20
In reply to Man, I stayed away too long, posted by Phil on July 21, 2003, at 13:28:57
and you've been missed dude!!
Posted by NikkiT2 on July 21, 2003, at 15:45:07
In reply to Man, I stayed away too long, posted by Phil on July 21, 2003, at 13:28:57
Good to see you hear Phil. And hope you had a great birthday
Nikki xx
Posted by noa on July 21, 2003, at 17:49:40
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long » Phil, posted by NikkiT2 on July 21, 2003, at 15:45:07
Phil--Hi, friend!
Is it ok to say "Happy" Birthday?
Well, if it is, then HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
If not, you'll deal with it, no?
I think you need to collect your essays and publish them--you have a unique and wonderful voice!
You mentioned pectus excavatum, which I hadn't heard of before, but I just spent a few minutes reading about it online. I hadn't known that about you and hadn't known about PE. Is your experience with it something you want to tell us more about?
I miss you 'round these parts. So, no pressure, but I love seeing you when you do stop by.
Ignore my message to you in a previous thread--it is now redundant, and ill informed.
Man, good to see ya.
Posted by shar on July 21, 2003, at 21:15:28
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long--yes, Phil!, posted by noa on July 21, 2003, at 17:49:40
Posted by judy1 on July 22, 2003, at 11:59:51
In reply to Man, I stayed away too long, posted by Phil on July 21, 2003, at 13:28:57
Too true, Phil- and you have been greatly missed. 50!!!!- it's time to go on your u-turn, so 49 next year :-). Hope you have a great day, and I'm glad you are feeling a little better- judy
Posted by noa on July 22, 2003, at 18:49:32
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long » Phil, posted by judy1 on July 22, 2003, at 11:59:51
A "U" turn--what a great idea!
I got to turn 40 two years in a row, actually! I liked it. My co-workers thought I was turning 40 on my 41st b-day, and they made a big deal and brought a cake to our meeting, etc. I enjoyed the repeat and decided I would turn 40 every year from then on.
Posted by Phil on July 22, 2003, at 19:21:57
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long » judy1, posted by noa on July 22, 2003, at 18:49:32
Thank y'all for thinking about me. I'm under the grip of some bad Karma these days. I won't be very consistent about stopping by but that could change.
Oh, I have a good joke. Here goes...__________
I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge,
about to jump off. So I ran over and said, "Stop! Don't do it!""Why shouldn't I?" he said.
I said, "Well, there's so much to live for!"
He said, "Like what?"
I said, "Well...are you religious or atheist?"
He said, "Religious."
I said, "Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?"
He said, "Christian."
I said, "Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant?"
He said, "Protestant."
I said, "Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"
He said, "Baptist!"
I said, "Wow! Me too! Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the
Lord?"He said, "Baptist Church of God!"
I said, "Me too! Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you Reformed
Baptist Church of God?"He said, "Reformed Baptist Church of God!"
I said, "Me too! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1879,
or Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915?"He said, "Reformed Baptist Church of God, reformation of 1915!"
I said, "Die, heretic scum!" and pushed him off.
---Emo Philips
Posted by noa on July 23, 2003, at 21:00:49
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long, posted by Phil on July 22, 2003, at 19:21:57
That was a good one. I don't understand all the specific details, but enough to appreciate it. And I'm gonna pass it on to a friend who will really relate to it.
Posted by judy1 on July 23, 2003, at 23:54:01
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long » judy1, posted by noa on July 22, 2003, at 18:49:32
Hey noa, if you can get away with turning 40 every year I say go for it! My favorite thing that happened to me was when I went to an ER and was unconcious (car accident)- the attending wrote down I was in my mid 20s on the ER sheet, when in fact I'm almost a decade older. I got a copy of it and took it in to renew my driver's license, but they wouldn't go for it :-(. But I still carry it in my wallet, it's nice to know I look so much younger when I'm comatose. take care- judy
Posted by noa on July 24, 2003, at 5:31:47
In reply to Getting older » noa, posted by judy1 on July 23, 2003, at 23:54:01
Posted by Phil on July 24, 2003, at 12:33:35
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long--yes, Phil!, posted by noa on July 21, 2003, at 17:49:40
Growing up w/ pectus and having it now sucks.
Now, by local surgeon standards, an too old for the corrective operation which is incredibly painful anyway.
Friends say it's no big deal; that's because they don't have it. Read about the people's pain with this and their joy after having it fixed.
My inability to deal with it has, as much as anything, kept me closeted away and contributed a lot to my depression.
I can't afford the two main docs in the US that are great at the operation plus I'm getting too old to be sliced open.
I saw 3 local surgeons and each one was a prick. Well, if you had a normal chest, what would you be, a famous athlete? That's what one said. I said no, but I might be able to f'ing breathe better and my heart won't be displaced you prick.
I walked out.
That's what pectus is like as a grown up. I put up with so much growing up with it that I've blocked it all.
It's a real self-esteem killer. I can't get this fixed and 1/2 the women you see want volleyball sized boobs. Or if your nose is slightly off, fix it. I'd much rather have a 'visible' problem than this any day.
Posted by shar on July 24, 2003, at 14:29:15
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long--noa, posted by Phil on July 24, 2003, at 12:33:35
What is the condition you have...I mean, does it make your ribs grow differently so they displace your heart and/or other organs? It causes you pain? No wonder you're f'ing depressed. Chronic pain alone is enough to do that, imo.
Sorry if this is too nosey, but you know I'm nosey.
Shar
Posted by judy1 on July 24, 2003, at 14:31:11
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long--noa, posted by Phil on July 24, 2003, at 12:33:35
Surgeons, by nature, all seem to have that nasty attitude. I don't know very much about your disorder- it sounds really painful. Do you take anything for the pain? Are there medical centers that specialize in this and would be more inclined to use surgery? I guess I wouldn't give up on that route since it sounds like that's the optimal treatment. Take care of yourself and I hope you begin to feel better- judy
Posted by Phil on July 24, 2003, at 21:15:44
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long--noa » Phil, posted by judy1 on July 24, 2003, at 14:31:11
Google pectus excavatum and you'll see lots of web sites on it. Basically, it's inherited, my father had it but my two GD brothers don't, lucky, they call me lucky.
It's an overgrowth of cartlidge at the sternum. The cartlidge meets at your sternum and starts growing in or out(pectus I forgot).
I saw a baby picture of me and it was real obvious then and it gets a little worse as you age. No pain except very rarely I turn in a weird way. Your body adapts to the growth but the best doctors, I spoke with the two best surgeons on this, there are tons of benefits. Increased lung capacity, everything falls into place, etc. But the biggest rush, by far, for those who've done the operation is about an immediate 500% increase in self-esteem. It's devastating to have problems like this and very hard to do any shirtless activities. You don't see many people with pectus because they don't want to be seen. I think it's like 1 in 400 that has it. Mostly boys but not totally uncommon with girls, where it has to be extremely hard to deal with.
People, thanks to the internet are educated just like us on depression, A lot of people didn't even know there was an operation but they have it done on their 6 year old and they are thrilled their kids won't have to deal with the abuse. People travel from all over the place to have this operation. It's way easier if you are 5-13 age group, bones are softer and that relates to a much easier operation.
They have 3 different operations to correct it. The Nuss method is by far the best. Check this out. They go between your ribs with a steel bar, hopefully missing your heart. The bar is measured specifically for you. It has a bend in the middle that matches your chest. The bar goes in with the bar facing your back. When the doctors turn it, your chest literally pops out.
They attach the bar to ribs on each side and take it out many months later, can't remember how long. The other methods, the Ravitch and one that Dr. Leonard invented(CRS), involve cutting blood loss, etc. There's a real good head of surgery at UCLA, Dr. Fonkalshrud(sp) that does the Ravitch method. Lots of cutting, reshaping the chest wall and leaving in a bar to hold it in place. You have a pretty good scar but the doc is very good, most are very pleased.
I've heard that after some operations, you are in extreme pain for a few weeks. Hard to escape pain when you're pushing your skeleton into place. : )
With my insurance getting whacked bad at the state, there's no way. I cope.That's all I've got for now...Obviously, I don't talk about this much.
Posted by noa on July 24, 2003, at 21:19:16
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long--noa, posted by Phil on July 24, 2003, at 12:33:35
Phil, I saw some of the personal web pages of people who have had surgery--apparently there are different types of procedures. But the stuff I read did look quite invasive and painful, it's true.
What an awful predicament.
I HATE that these surgeons were so insensitive to you!!!
I'm glad you felt ok talking about it, though. I don't know if it helps, but to have suffered with this so long and not felt anyone was listening must make it worse.
Your friends saying it isn't a big deal--do they mean that to try to assure you that this difference doesn't change how they feel about you?
I am sure from your point of view it must be a HUGE deal, with the physical discomfort and especially not getting any support growing up with this.
Posted by Phil on July 24, 2003, at 23:23:44
In reply to Re: Man, I stayed away too long--noa » Phil, posted by noa on July 24, 2003, at 21:19:16
I don't feel pain from it unless I do a weird movement and even then, no big deal.
I've asked girlfriends before and it was no big deal to them but I always asked during sex.
I think they were talking about my chest...hmmm.
Yeah, the hardest thing is growing up never telling one person how it felt.
God, I hated shirts and skins games in high school. Junior high was hell. I've been a nervous wreck most of my life.
Insurance mafia call it cosmetic surgery but doctors usually tell the insurance people it's necessary and ask them to get their checkbook out of the cobwebs. Can you believe fixing a deformity being classified as cosmetic. Even if it was cosmetic, it kills kids self-esteem.
Posted by NikkiT2 on July 25, 2003, at 8:17:41
In reply to Re: Man, I wrote a longass postnoa,shar and judy1, posted by Phil on July 24, 2003, at 21:15:44
Wow, Phil.. I did a google on it when you first mentioned it, but I didn't see any that described in the way you do.
You know what though.. we all think TONS of you here.. thats one great thing about the net.. you fall in love with the person, not with their physical crap.. I was so in love with J before we met that he could have looked like Quasimodo for all I cared!!
You're a TOP guy hun..
Nikki xx
Posted by Phil on July 25, 2003, at 9:30:07
In reply to Re: Man, I wrote a longass postnoa,shar and judy1, posted by NikkiT2 on July 25, 2003, at 8:17:41
> Wow, Phil.. I did a google on it when you first mentioned it, but I didn't see any that described in the way you do.
I was on LSD. : ) joke
>
> You know what though.. we all think TONS of you here.. thats one great thing about the net.. you fall in love with the person, not with their physical crap.. I was so in love with J before we met that he could have looked like Quasimodo for all I cared!!
>
> You're a TOP guy hun..Thanks Nikki, When can I swing by ________(your town) and pick you up. Use shar as my reference. : )
>
> Nikki xx
Posted by NikkiT2 on July 25, 2003, at 11:02:22
In reply to Re: Man, I wrote a ... » NikkiT2, posted by Phil on July 25, 2003, at 9:30:07
Any time in good ole Blighty hun there is a drink of your choice waiting for you!!!
I'm feeling all loved up about about PB2000 today... I feel so good about all the people here..
*runs around hugging everyone*
Nikki xx
Posted by Phil on July 25, 2003, at 12:28:07
In reply to Re: Man, I wrote a ... » Phil, posted by NikkiT2 on July 25, 2003, at 11:02:22
I'm going to Mapquest now. : )
Posted by shar on July 25, 2003, at 13:39:20
In reply to Re: Man, I wrote a ... » NikkiT2, posted by Phil on July 25, 2003, at 12:28:07
Posted by Phil on July 26, 2003, at 21:14:42
In reply to Yep, he's easy on the eyes, gals........ (nm), posted by shar on July 25, 2003, at 13:39:20
Women run for cover, god bless em. They see the "Here comes trouble" tattoo on my forehead.
Being a alcoholics kid, I don't have relationships,
I take hostages.
Posted by allisonm on July 29, 2003, at 21:07:54
In reply to My cat just stays for free food. Women run..., posted by Phil on July 26, 2003, at 21:14:42
Sorry, Phil,
As a child of a alcoholic mom and grandparents, and after reading your posts for all of this time, I have a hard time believing that line re' taking hostages....
My cats love me because I feed them too. And rub their ears. One of them loves me so much that I found out today that he's qualified for a study on obese cats at the university vet school. If I enroll the 16-pounder in this weight-loss experiment, they'll give me free food. Hooray!! Think of the money I'll be saving! I could buy groceries! But you know, when my cats find out about this, they'll be demanding more fur toy mice...
Posted by Phil on July 29, 2003, at 22:40:14
In reply to Re: My cat just stays for free food. Women run... » Phil, posted by allisonm on July 29, 2003, at 21:07:54
This is the end of the thread.
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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