Posted by TexasChic on January 19, 2008, at 18:04:41
In reply to Re: Scared of job search failure/maxime » stargazer2, posted by maxime on January 6, 2008, at 22:58:21
I never really went an extended time without a job, but I have dealt with the bully thing numerous times. Well, actually only 3 times, but it seems numerous.
I'm dealing with a bully right now, but I think I'm actually handling it better because I know I've been through worse. I sometimes imagine my current bully up against my former bully... she wouldn't stand a chance! Somehow looking at it like that makes it easier.
I've been taking small steps at standing up to her, and although it makes her completely furious, no major ramifications have resulted from it. Just the other day she was demanding I stop what I was working on and pull up something on my computer that she needed to look at. I told her, "Okay, in a minute". And she just stood there. I said, "I need to wrap up what I'm doing, so I'll let you know when I'm ready". She said, "I need to see it NOW". I said, "well I'm sorry but you'll just have to wait". (I should point out, this is VERY bold for me). Man, she was sooooo mad. She went straight to my supervisor to complain and she (my supervisor) just found someone else to pull up what she wanted to look at. As she (the bully) was stomping past my office she was mumbling loudly, "mumble mumble... can't talk to me that way!!" But then the next day it was as if nothing happened!
The thing is, while to us this is an extremely uncomfortable and traumatizing situation, to them its just normal everyday behavior! And when you think about it, these people are MUCH worse employees than we would ever make!
I think your fears are perfectly normal. The only thing to do is just keep on getting up, brushing yourself off, and trying again. That's what I'm doing anyway. And although things may not be perfect, they're definitely getting better.
-T
poster:TexasChic
thread:804017
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/work/20071028/msgs/807763.html