Posted by introuble on May 12, 2005, at 15:16:54
In reply to Re: I've got to figure out how to stop too!, posted by anthology on August 1, 2004, at 16:33:19
Ok, here is how it goes...I hate weed and yet I love smoking it...it is destroying my life and yet am attached to it...its wasting my PhD and keep going back to it..obviousle the feeling of guilt is overburdening me for I dont tend to do what I should be doing..This PhD is my dream and I have everything that helps making my dream true..but mr WEED is on the way...I promised myself million times...you know the outcome..I bought a TV/DVD to busy myself with it and forget weed..it didnt work..I paid a hypnotherpaist about 600 dollars..it didnt work..I am almost losing my girlfriend because of moodiness...I became anti-social and angry all time and want to take it on my housemates, friends..basically any one I see...I quit my job because of this..and for each job I apply I become to think that its the end of the world...I cant think ahead and comfort myself..I have no patience at all...am so hesitant in doing anything..I keep filing things and never sort them out...I keep giving myself excuses to smoke weed: this is the last I smoke, the last time I buy (the dealer is within easy acces in town..nio matter where i live...)..I lost 20kilos in wieght..because weed makes you slow and lazy..so I can be bothered to cook or bring food...I have gone out in long journeys to clear my mind and make new decisions for the best..but always I am dragged to this habbit...I talk myself through it by prmoises and telling myself off..I even hit myself as I gave up on myself...am losing it..am losing myself..my girlfriend and above all my dream..my PhD...PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAASSSSSSSSEEEEE....helppppppppppppppppppppppppppp......
poster:introuble
thread:368221
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20050506/msgs/496944.html