Posted by muffled on December 5, 2009, at 10:40:31
In reply to Re: Ha Ha -- the joke is on me » TherapyGirl, posted by Daisym on December 3, 2009, at 20:12:45
There are times in life to let go. We lose loved ones, and grieve. We grieve our lost lives, lost innocence. There is alot to grieve in this fallen world.
But there is alot to rejoice in too. The love of a pet, the kindness of another, the beauty of nature, the warmth of the sun.
TG, I am not posting here, but wanted to post to you cuz I care that you hurting.
I don't know what the right answers are. I can only assume and guess how you feel based on my life experiences and then extrapolate, perhaps innacurrately.
I think others have said good things. I really like what Daisy had to say.
Your T did help you. Hold on to the good.
But now its time to just let go, and go thru the grieving process.
I suspect your T is overwhelmed herself, this has been going on for a long time. Sounds like you are not the only one talking this hard. So T has to deal with the other clients too. Its sounds like she was a great and caring T, but now it is over, time to let go of her. I think she has no more that she is able to give. I think she might wish she did, but she has to do what she has to do.
I am glad you are considering another T, I think you need to ACTIVELY persue this.
My old T was no help in finding another T. I thot she would be so eager to help once she knew what I was looking for. I thot she would have T connections and would know HOW to find another T that would better suit me. Turns out she didn't. But she was willing to support thru until I got the new T. I actually quit earlier cuz I didn't like the torture of seeing her when I knew I was going to quit.
We did still keep in touch a bit, and I still care bout oldT, but its not very intense anymore. I think like Dinah said, we get the best of our T's really, and once no longer in the T situ....its not the same...
So think about what you want in a t? Then make a list of 'interview' questions, and start phoning. If some come across all righton the phone, then consider going in for a F2F interview. And the first T you actually go to multiple sessions may the 'the one', or not. If not, keep trying. A good T is a wonderous find and worth the effort ultimately.
I was talking to someone who after 8 T interviews, gave up, then tried one more time awhile later, and got the best T ever!!!!(she was a complex trauma case, so it was especially hard to find aT experienced in that).
I think a new T can offer whole new perspectives. You may be wonderfully suprized to come out of the T rut, and onto a different T road.(ok, that last sentence was DUMB!!!!)
But seriously, I just hope you can get down to business in searching for a T that suits you. If you search on the internet for ideas of things to look for in a T etc, there are sites that offer ideas about questions to ask etc.
T searching is hard and can seem overwhelming, but once you kinda get into it , its not as bad as you might think.
I gotta say, if I was you. I would like to maintain some small contact w/oldT, just to know she there, but I would immediately be looking for anew one cuz going to old one is too tortuous.
I rambling and not talking so good, but I trying real hard. I think others say it better.
Anyhow, ya, things WILL get better. You been living under this dark cloud of T leaving for a long time now. But once you get out from under it, proly things'll look better.
And a new T might be a great thing to help you move ahead w/life.
I sorry you hurting so bad. You a cool person, I hate that you hurting.
But I know too it gets better, its gonna be better.
I will check in here from time to time. Mebbe you can start a thread on T hunting and lets us know hows it going?
Like mebbe "today I looked in the phone book and wrote down x names. I phoned 1 so far." etc. So that way we kinda doing the hunt WITH you as best we can.
There are good T's out there. There are CRUMMY T's out there, and everything in btwn. You go out there and find a great T !!!!
Good luck, best wishes, sorry youse hurting,
Sorry this is jumbled.
I just want you to be Ok.
I not gonna post here anymore, cuz this site is messed. But I watch for you TG.
OK I go now.
Muffled etc
poster:muffled
thread:927957
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20091022/msgs/928166.html