Posted by rskontos on February 7, 2009, at 12:10:17
In reply to Developmental stages in therapy, posted by DAisym on February 6, 2009, at 23:31:42
Daisym,
I too have been having extra hard weeks. For some reason unknown to me my new job is extra triggering for me. I thought it would just get better and to hang in there but is it not. Worse in fact. I am dissociating at work at an all high new level and in new ways. Ways I thought had dissappeared along side new ones. And the ways I am just not sure about the whys that go with them. Most of my t's questions get and I don't know.
Anyway, this has led to a tough time in sessions. With me thinking all types of things good and bad, mostly about my T. But in all due fairness it is just my messiness that has me misinterpreting him. And then again, it is me being too much in my head.
I am sorry you are having a tough go. I just wanted to share that I relate.
I think for me, I am in and out more like Antigua. I will pass through a phase and then seem to go back.
Sometimes more like how a child does with their parents. Wanting to be independent yet fighting it.
I have the huge trust issues. And while I need to trust him I just won't admit it or admit I am trusting him. And when he points I am trusting him more and more I look at him in amazement.
Sometimes I feel ok. But to voice it from either my T or myself would I think make it flee out the window. It is that shaky a feeling.
I expect to be abandoned. We discussed this the last time. The need to be believed and the fear of abandonment.
First time in forever I cried like I did. In fact I could not stop.
sigh, it is so tough. I notice so many of us are facing tough times.
Wonder if it is in the water supply.
rsk
hopefully if we just hold each other up in cyberspace through support we can get some comfort in that :)
poster:rskontos
thread:878656
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090129/msgs/878722.html