Posted by Partlycloudy on November 25, 2008, at 19:08:13
In reply to Re: Nasty week (suicide ideation TRIGGER) » Partlycloudy, posted by lucie lu on November 25, 2008, at 17:47:25
I think that I was able to pinpoint this spiral as a medication-induced one, rather than one as part of the trauma. I feel that when the long half-life of Prozac was finally washed out of my system was when I quickly went downhill. At the same time, I purposefully have NOT been working on the trauma, because I have recognized that it's going to work itself out during its own good time; there's no need for me to push it along in one way or another. I might at some point get some EMDR treatment, thought at this immediate moment I think I'm still in crisis mode, and a little more time-distance is needed. Interesting, too, that I have NOT heard from my mother since she dropped her bombshell. I wonder if she knows what she has done?
I'm a bit afraid of massage, having had nothing but poor experiences so far. I have been taking more baths than usual, and just curling up into a ball once I'm in there. (Sounds and is awkward, yet I find it really soothing. I light a candle and play soft music. It helps for a little while.) The acupuncture has proved to be too expensive for right now, but I've picked back up my yoga practice yet again, and indeed, the absolutely wonderful and resourceful women at the studio never cease to amaze me with their intuitive strength and comfort for me. And, I'm going back to the chiropractor. It would seem that I'm having to consciously remind myself to attend to myself when I need this the most (and am most likely to advise others to do the same).
I think that at some point in the near future, I'll ask my T about bringing my husband in for a session so she can bring him in to my treatment plan somewhat. I am sh*t scared to try to talk to him about it all myself, but with how I've been feeling this past week, I realize that he needs to be more in tune with just how low I can go.
Thank you all for your loving and kind words this evening.
poster:Partlycloudy
thread:865229
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081120/msgs/865269.html