Posted by 10derHeart on April 28, 2008, at 18:13:52
In reply to Re: I have three sessions left » 10derHeart, posted by Dinah on April 28, 2008, at 17:01:05
You've got that just right on both counts.
And thank you for writing it here. It somehow looks 'good' in writing (if anything about leaving him can be called good) and it made me tear up in a nice way, instead of the terrified, grief-stricken way I so often do these days.
It's funny - it seems it troubles and saddens him enough he isn't even crazy about saying conclusion - that one is more my word. He'll stumble and fumble around and say the relationship is just changing - a lot, yes, but it's going into another stage is all.
I used to get a little upset and tell him not to minimize the hugeness of this loss for me, and he'd apologize. But lately, by putting together a bunch of other things he's said and done, I'm realizing he's using certain terms because of how sad *he* feels and how his emotions are stirred up thinking of how he'll miss our relationship, too. He even wrote in an email once that he "didn't want to think about it" until he had to, because he doesn't like the idea of not seeing me any more one bit.
It's got to be a testament to growth and the success of our therapeutic relationship that I even recognize these genuine feelings on his side of the room, and actually believe they are real.....and....well, I guess I have to see I am worthy of them. That is so huge, really.
poster:10derHeart
thread:826098
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080423/msgs/826112.html