Posted by muffled on January 21, 2008, at 15:46:35
In reply to Re: These my last 2 mails to T....mutant...., posted by muffled on January 21, 2008, at 14:14:41
Why I can't settle.
Why I increasingly fussed.
Why I want to escape.
Why I run away from T.
STOOPID IKIDS.
DUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHH.
OK, smarter part of me sees this more globally, the whole picture of behaviours. Says to me I working up to something. Some ikid want to SAY something. I FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT it. I DO NOT wannna hear. They make no sense. F*CK. This is getting cyclical. So according to cycle I either maim myself, get dangerous, or sometimes it blows over on its own and I end up a rumbling pot of stew inside.
Its the rage, there is SO much anger somewhere.
I dunno WTF to DO about it. I get so tired of this cycle. One day I gonna die. I goto take care of myself for my kids. Its not enuf to beat pillows etc, I have to FEEL the pain, SEE the pain. Oh this is all so stupid and melodramatic.
I'll just shut the hell up now.
Sorry.
Now I reckon everyone SORRY I posted :-( Sorry.
I just keep hoping someone will tell me the 'secret' of the magic thing I goto DO to make it stop :-(
M
poster:muffled
thread:808123
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080114/msgs/808184.html