Posted by scentedgarden on March 6, 2007, at 8:06:44
In reply to Termination sucks big time, posted by Happyflower on March 5, 2007, at 17:22:12
((((Oh... happyflower)))))
I just read ur post, and im sitting here crying my eyes and heart out with you...I don't know if you're interested, but i'm going through the same process of termiation..( God i hate the word as it sounds like an abortion!!!...sorry to anyone reading this if that's upsetting way for me to feel about just a word)))) anyway Oh dear happyflower.. I'm sorry I can't say much to you right now..as I'm sobbing here as I type this... I just want to say I know what you mean about the pain of doing without them and then stirring it all up again..!! >>>>>> As I too am tapering off gradually.. I went from weekly over Xmas... then jumped to fornithly for just 2 sessions... then I had a huge jump of 5 weeks untill my next appt on 27th Feb... It was awful as we argued the whole time, and she said not only the bad things I mentioned here... she did say one or two nice things as well... But waht she said about the hurt I'm feeling is that "she is not the one hurting me, that I'm hurting myself"... and that the situation is also hurting me but that it's nothing to do with her...and waht she's doing to me by cutting off ALL contact inbetween such long gaps in the final appointments,, and barred me from calling her main office ever again, so im the laughing stock of her office staff at the hospital where i was born many yrs ago..! It's just that before x,as my therpaist called me often and was verry communicative nad responsive to me and she was helping me heal so much... Now she has changed and I'm suffering distress like i never knew possible... It's not just cos the therapy is ending it's cos she refuses to even let me know in between if she got an email i sent to her... which is a main reason why my 4th last precious appointment with her was a disaster, as we were not on the same page so to speak...!! anyway, sorry that you are feeling all this pain... I know sorry doesnt help, and that you've asked lots of questions in your post which I think you already know the answers to...at least you have still got a good relationship with him.. and i guess you still see him at the gym... and at least you know maybe it's time the therapy was brought to an end, but you just feel you want to keep him as your mentor... All I can say is I know exactly how you feel... I want to keep mine too... But she's doing such a good job of pushing me away, that it hurts so much Im not sure what will happen... I mean how the end will pan out... My next appointment isn't until April... another 5 weeks wait in between.. PLEASE PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR TALKAING ABOUT MYSELF... I NEVER MEANT TO... I WAS TRYING TO SAY I UNDERSTAND HOW YOU FEEL!!!!!!!!
as to whether HE kows how you feel, ( mean to answer your last question, about the pain in your heart and if he knows that your hearrt is aching...I dont know the answer to that, i think you have to go on your own instincts... therapy !! who would have it ?? I know we all have loved them in our lives... but the pain of ending is something I wasn't prepared for... and I guess neither were you... It's nice to see you back on babble.
Much kind thoughts sent your way.. hang in there!
Sg
poster:scentedgarden
thread:738547
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070215/msgs/738659.html