Posted by Racer on October 30, 2006, at 12:27:25
In reply to Should a therapist keep a personal blog?, posted by indigogal on October 30, 2006, at 11:17:57
I don't know quite how I want to respond to this. I guess I'm going to be careful about it, because my initial reaction to this probably can't be expressed without violating the civility guidelines of this site...
First, let me say welcome to Babble! If you've been reading for a couple of weeks, you'll already know that this is a great place to get support and advice. I hope you find it as helpful as I have over the years.
As for googling your T, I think that's not terribly uncommon. {rolls eyes} In fact, after I pick myself up off the floor where I've been rolling around laughing -- let me wipe my eyes -- I think *most* of us have googled our Ts. I've looked mine up on licensing boards, and court records, and yes, I've googled my T. I've explored her website, and explored all the links from it. We've never talked about it, but I don't think it would be an issue if I did bring it up.
Of course, my T has been at this a while, and her website is very professional and strictly about her practice. That probably makes a difference. We don't necessarily talk a lot about her life, but there have been times it's come up. (I taught her how to make buttonholes by hand, for instance, when she mentioned something she needed to make buttonholes on.) And she's been doing this a long time now. She's good at it. I figure she knows whether there are parts of her life I would benefit from knowing, and she'll tell me if there are.
When I read your post, my first thought was, "why does the T have a blog that's public for keeping in touch with her family?" All she'd have to do is put password protection on her blog, and there's no potential issue. My second thought was, "If she hasn't made any effort to keep her blog private, why does she consider your having read it to be aggressive or stalking behavior?" If I try to put myself into her place on this, I think I might be feeling a little defensive. I might say that I wasn't the one who made a mistake, even though I really thought maybe I had. That's just my idea of what I might be going through in her position.
I don't think it's necessary for the two of you to discuss the content of her blog -- unless you find that she's writing about you or other clients, which is a whole 'nother story -- but I do think it's worth talking to her some more about why she thinks it's aggressive behavior for you to have read it? Or if she thinks simply googling her was an act of online stalking?
But if I were to let my T know that I'd read something about her online, and she told me that that was stalking behavior on my part, I know that I would have a hard time continuing to work with her. I have enough trouble with trust, and that would cause some substantial damage to the therapeutic alliance between us.
I hope my thoughts help.
poster:Racer
thread:699020
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061026/msgs/699031.html