Posted by littleone on August 16, 2006, at 22:04:48
In reply to Do you see what I hear?, posted by Daisym on August 14, 2006, at 23:57:39
> So what has changed to make you question that?" That's the million dollar question, isn't it? So what am I seeing that makes me hear things that aren't there? And how do I stop doing that!!?
I think it's because of our beliefs. For example, lets say you had a belief that said "I am unwanted". A lot of other beliefs and behaviours and thoughts and feelings and defenses and stuff are driven by that belief.
So in order for you to maintain these things, you need to maintain the belief. So you tend to pick up on things that will reinforce or prove the belief to be true and you will tend to overlook or explain away anything that disproves the belief.
"Hearing" a tone in your T's voice is one way you could continue to prove your belief correct.
I haven't read anything about this, but I tend to believe that changing your beliefs would happen in stages. So if say your belief was "I am unwanted", then even starting to believe "I am wanted by my T" would not be enough to eradicate the attempts to prove the "I am unwanted" belief true. It would just be a first step.
I tend to think that it is only once you change the deep "I am unwanted" belief to the world at large that you would stop trying to prove it true.
And I think that starts with learning to believe that "I am wanted by my T" and gradually working out from there.
I should clarify that whenever I said "you" in this, I don't mean you specifically, I mean anyone really. And I'm not saying the belief driving this is "I am unwanted", that was just an example that came to mind.
poster:littleone
thread:676556
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060808/msgs/677282.html