Posted by muffled on June 25, 2006, at 23:25:55
In reply to I feel so pathetic, posted by milly on June 25, 2006, at 10:07:10
You are SO not pathetic Milly. Your a strong woman having some challenges.
I agree with (falls?)
*** When I do something good, it scares me because I think that people are going to expect me to keep functioning at that level. These days I can have spurts when I can do good stuff, but then I need some down time before the next spurt. When people say "Wow, you did great on Wednesday", I hear "So why didn't you do wonderful things on Thursday, Friday and Saturday???". It helps me to look at longer periods of time - how have I done for the last month, rather than the last day. That way the peaks and valleys smooth out a bit.Yeah, I get freaked when I start doing good, cuz I afraid people will expect too much from me and that I will just inevitably dissapoint them.
I find it really hard to ID the negative crapola that goes on in my head.
I findit helpful to write it down-and refute the negative and mostly untrue statements. Then I read the bad one and rate how it makes me feel. Then I read the good and more reality based statement and rate how I feel(eg on a scale of 1-10)
Usu. the good one does make me feel better.
This does take practice.
I wish you could find a good IRL counsellor that was any good and have some help sorting this stuff out. Its really hard to do on your own. And a good T makes you feel ok about it, no matter what you say.
My T grounds me and keeps me from spinning into outer space!
Anyhow Milly, keep posting if you like, someone is is proly reading and lurking and saying 'hey, I know EXACTLY what she means, I'm NOT the only one who feels this way.'
And proly feeling less alone.
Take care,
Your a special one,
Muffled
poster:muffled
thread:661259
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060623/msgs/661464.html