Posted by llrrrpp on June 2, 2006, at 15:45:23
In reply to Re: Dear ME trigger » llrrrpp, posted by Dinah on June 2, 2006, at 15:28:58
Dinah,
i don't even know what i need. It's kind of a problem lately.
Yesterday i needed to hurt. I would have loved it if Psycho-babble had a masochism board. We could post something personal on there, like...
i don't like my 4th toe. it looks like a troll.
... and people would instantaneously write hideous and uncivil things (starting with a personal critique of my toe, and ending with a prompt for me to end my tenure as a living creature). THAT's what I needed yesterday (or at least what I was crying out for. What the dark voice wanted).
I got what I needed, eventually. Someone reached out to me, and made me talk. (Thank you). this has happened a few times now. I consider myself lucky. (thank you again). and here I am. still among the living.
but what do I *need*? It depends on which voice is screaming the loudest. The louder the dark voice is, the more resistant I am to love and support. but actually that's what I'm crying out for. right? huh? yeah. That's probably why I'm on "psycho-babble", instead of "healthy-chat"
At the moment, I *NEED* a real life hug, but I have to hang on a few more days. I know no huggers in my immediate vicinity.
well. thanks for asking. i think i needed to talk about my needs. ja.
poster:llrrrpp
thread:650669
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060526/msgs/652006.html