Posted by B2chica on February 13, 2006, at 13:47:28
In reply to Why won't they help me I asked*trigger* rant, posted by James K on February 13, 2006, at 13:36:06
you sound as confused as me, maybe more so. your sentences read left and right views all the way through.
i'm sorry you're getting the run around. i got that too at the hospitals, but i was lucky enough to have a T and pdoc that would tell me-go and i'd tell the staff that and no problem. one time though i couldn't decide and my T suggested i could call. well all she said was that i should be ok, but before i act i should call again. but i probably won't need to come in. well i ended up going and she treated me horribly. she recognized my voice cuz she said first of "so...you decided to come in huh?" then she made me do a strip search kinda thing, i was humiliated and bawled the whole time it was horrible.
but i have had good experiences there too.sometimes i wish i'd do something to break the law...i want a cop to come and cuff me and let me fight him every inch of the way, sometimes i feel that's the only way i'd get someone to come that close to protecting me or taking care of me. to feel the warmth of a body that close to me, making me do what i know i need to do.
sounds nuts huh. can't explain it but it's a strong wish/feeling.you sound like you're hurting james. can i be here for you?
sometimes another aspect of me comes out and i'll try not to let her post to you cuz she's scared and becoming bitter.
but i can sypathize with your torment.just know we are here for you.
cares
b2c.
poster:B2chica
thread:609198
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060211/msgs/609202.html