Posted by LegWarmers on February 9, 2006, at 17:05:31
In reply to “failure” success, posted by pseudoname on February 5, 2006, at 2:34:58
> I get stuck with about 90% of the stuff I want to do. I just can't bring myself to do it! This includes everything from brushing my teeth or mailing a package up to calling a sewer repairman. I just feel like I've got a ten-ton weight inside me. The harder I force myself, the heavier the weight gets.
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> I've psychoanalyzed these things inside out without success (at doing them). I've tried to mindfully accept or tolerate whatever bad feelings these actions might generate, but that's only marginally helpful.
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> My pdoc said it's OCD: I'm afraid of criticism and I need these actions to be super-super-perfect, which they're guaranteed not to be.
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> For years, I've said I'm just afraid of success, no matter how small.
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> Anyway, a couple days ago, I tried pre-emptively labeling an impossible task as a "Failure". I'd had to mail a package for the last 5 days and just couldn't bring myself to take the first step. I could lie there yelling at myself, "YOU HAVE TO DO THIS! JUST DO IT, YOU MORON!" No help.
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> Then I imagined, before I did it, that it was a failure. I imagined that even if I wrapped it perfectly and mailed it and it arrived in great condition and was well-received, it would still be a failure. And hey! All the tension over it went away. I DID IT, no problem. I even had the spontaneous thought, while doing it, "Eh, it doesn't have to be *perfect*."
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> Then I tried it on a constant struggle, brushing my teeth. I told myself, "Even if I brush each tooth individually, all the way around it, this will be a failure." Again, the tension and horrible struggle over brushing went away, and I just brushed them and that was that.
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> Sometimes helpful little "tricks" work a couple times and poop-out quickly. I wonder if this will.i do this too! I thought I lost this post! I couldnt find it after I first read it. Anyway I do this, although it stopped working for me recently. our minds our so weird, arent they?
poster:LegWarmers
thread:606488
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060131/msgs/608039.html