Posted by daisym on January 20, 2006, at 19:37:54
In reply to Just crying my eyes out, posted by happyflower on January 20, 2006, at 4:40:52
I know this hurt so well and I can't begin to count the times I've said "I can never have what I want." What hurts the most for me about these feelings is that they shine a huge spot light on what is missing in my relationship with my husband. I wish I knew I could feel like this before I got married.
And separation is hard. To carry someone's essence with you, even when they aren't around is a huge gift. You have been able to do this in the past. There is no reason to think you can't do it in the future. Especially since the therapist that we all know and love in the consulting room is part real and part who they need to be for us. So we are allowed and expected to carry this individually crafted essence with us for strength and comfort. That might not be exactly what we (secretly) wanted but it might be more than we really expected too.
All that said, I worry constantly about being so invested in a relationship that will end. My therapist never lies to me by saying it won't but he tells me that I'll be ready for it when it happens. And he usually adds that I'll likely be more ready than he will.
I know it hurts. But it does get better. And then worse again. And then better...
poster:daisym
thread:600988
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060110/msgs/601250.html