Posted by allisonross on December 11, 2005, at 9:56:48
I think the best words we can ever say are:
What can I do to help? How can I help?
I am sorry I hurt you. Would you like to discuss it?
Instead of criticizing (or BEFORE criticizing); say: I am not sure what you meant by that....would you explain it to me?
That prevents misunderstanding. When all we see is words on a screen, it is easy to minsconstrue a person's words/intentions.
This kind of dialogue, would go far in preventing hurt feelings.
Perhaps (if I stay), I will put a trigger on ALL of my posts, and in the beginning of the message, put what it is about.
(and I repeat myself)..
I just got out of a 31 year marriage of abuse; criticism has no place in my life.
Thankyou.
Sincerely, Ally
poster:allisonross
thread:588005
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051210/msgs/588005.html