Posted by littleone on August 24, 2005, at 21:44:06
In reply to Re: Control (long) » littleone, posted by fallsfall on August 24, 2005, at 20:57:14
I was actually really hesitant to post about this because in my mind "control" has such a negative connotation. Like a controlling manipulative bitch.
My T was quick to point out that it isn't like that at all. That for me control is all about minimising threats. That everyone does this to a degree, but that I am trying to control too much. I see threats in things that aren't really threatening.
Are your control issues also centred around those ideas?
I think my T is a good one, but he's just never gentle or warm or validating or whatever. At least, not with me. It's possible he's like that with other clients he thinks would benefit from that, but he insists I wouldn't benefit from it in the long run.
And I'm not after a lot of that stuff. Just a little bit. But he won't do that.
The main reason I went back to him was that he said "There's *so* much I want to talk to you about". I could really feel how much he wanted to talk to me, to show me things.
That's all it takes. Just one little sentence.
And now I feel just awful 'cause that's such a pathetic reason to go back. But part of me clings to him for dear life and looks for any excuse to stay.
poster:littleone
thread:546139
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050824/msgs/546329.html