Posted by muffled on July 18, 2005, at 22:44:31
In reply to Re: Read what you write? » muffled, posted by Poet on July 18, 2005, at 21:44:45
> Hi Muffled,
>
> I hand things to my T and run out the door, including poems. I was trying to journal for awhile, without censoring it, and leaving it with her, but I started ripping it up.
>
> I can't read anything out loud to her. I'm uncomfortable if she reads, even silently, in front of me. I hardly talk in therapy, too. There's a bunch of us who sit there in silence, you have good company.
>
> PoetThanks for the reply poet. I am getting better at talking, as long as its not too personal!!!!!!!!!!
I don't even use my T,s name. I scarcely look at her.
I have thought of leaving her my journal, she has read parts of it, but I'm afraid she'll somehow, I don't know, like mebbe look down on me or something. Or HORRORS what is she doesn't want to read it (rejection!!!!).Or maybe its asking too much, I should pay her for her time to read it. I ............ the whole thing frazzles me. But I want her to know me so she can help me.It costs alot of $$$ so I goto hurry up and get my act together and get on with my life.Heres a prose I wrote and where i got my name from, it describes me some.
Comming out of the mist
Sometimes seeing more clearly
Glimpses of reality
Beautiful and free
Then falling back to the mist
That surrounds me
I can't see
I am lost
I am alone
Everything is muffled
Muted
What is real?
Acting in a play
Trying so hard to get it right
And getting it wrong
Crying out
Help me
Please
Its absorbed into the mist
No one can hear
I am alone
I want to be safe
I want to be OK
I want to be valued
I want to be good
I want to help others
I want to be nurtured
I want to be holy
I want to cry
But I don't know how.Thanks for listening.
poster:muffled
thread:527840
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050716/msgs/529950.html