Posted by Shortelise on April 11, 2005, at 18:12:28
In reply to Re: Difficult decision - Tamar » Shortelise, posted by Tamar on April 11, 2005, at 14:09:10
Well, there you go - close to termination as I am (ok, I'm not as close as my T would like to think I am - I am going to titrate!!) I was on the money about you, was I? It's so funny, really, I'm laughing - at myself of course!- because I get it entirely, feel it to the bottom of my feet. Let's see, hmm... I'm all better now, but, gosh, I do have this funny little itch over here that just might be a CRISIS! Yes indeedy, gotta watch out for those sneaking crises, those that weren't there a minute ago.
Tamar, yesterday I had a situation in a shop which five years ago would have sent me into a nervous breakdown, but I handled it with aplomb, and walked away with both me and the other guy smiling. It's a huge breakthrough for me. I can do this now, deal with touchy situations. But it made me cry like crazy today when I told my husband about it. It's not that I want to stay in that lousy place where I was, and it's really not that I want to sit on my T's lap for the rest of my life, either. I'm not sure why it made me so sad.
I think when I am in your shoes, when I've finally seen my T for the last time (when I am very old, and my hair is grey and down to my knees) if I have stuff like this come up for me, I will call him. I will say, I think this is coming up for this reason, but I wanted to run it by you because it's so sneaky, and if I am getting this sneaky about wanting to talk to you, I thought I should just give you a call so I don't have to resort to unconscious sneakiness. I would want to be able to think, ah, I need to make sure he's till there, and call him and say, hey, I just needed to make sure you're still there (tears filling my eyes).
I do agree that breathing space is probably a good idea. Therapy does keep things in upheaval, and it's not a great thing to get comfortable with, if you know what I mean.
Good luck with this. It is so so helpful to hear about these trials and tribulations. Thanks.
ShortE
poster:Shortelise
thread:482545
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050409/msgs/482974.html