Posted by mair on April 10, 2005, at 10:40:21
In reply to thank you, posted by octavia on April 9, 2005, at 19:24:07
I really agree with ShortE. I got really angry with a T once and while I kept seeing him (he was also my pdoc) he never treated me quite the same after that, and he never encouraged me to process my anger. I don't ever recall talking to him about it except to apologize.
Years later, I've discovered how much all of that bothered me. I've discussed it with my current T a number of times - in fact almost every time I run into my ex-T. My current T has helped me to sometimes accept that it wasn't my fault and that my T surely should have helped me/pressured me to process what was going on. You sound as if you are in so much pain. She's also pointed out that the whole incident sent me the very dangerous message that it wasn't ok to express my anger to someone who's hurt me. I think this pdoc hurt you by his own failings and you need to find a way for it not to torment you as much. The passage of time never made the hurt go away for me; it just postponed any hope I had of closure.
I hope you can find someone to help you with this.
Please keep posting.
mair
poster:mair
thread:481822
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050409/msgs/482319.html