Posted by pinkeye on April 6, 2005, at 17:58:43
In reply to Re: Enough of it (too long) » 10derHeart, posted by pinkeye on April 6, 2005, at 12:55:32
Truth is, my ex T is really a nice person. I wish I have little more maturity to be more stable myself, and be able to take my attachment to him in a right way, and not cause myself so much of pain. That is what I have been trying to do, but unfortunately, it has been a roller coaster ride. On the days when I like myself more, I am fine with things.. on the days when I don't like myself all that much, then I start behaving like a kid - and then be angry with myself, frustrated with him etc etc.
I think it is all my own makings.. and nothing really to do with him. he has tried to help me as genuinely as possible and he has behaved to his best. And I think he was quite sincere. Only sometimes I try to read too much meanings into what he says, and trying to interpret it in ways he didn't mean it. And I keep wishing that he likes me a lot more, when I know he doesn't. And it hurts me and then I end up throwing up all sorts of fits to myself.
But writing about all these in babble freely without fear has been putting more sense into me lately.
poster:pinkeye
thread:480375
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050329/msgs/480829.html