Posted by mair on March 14, 2005, at 16:25:59
In reply to When is Enough Enough?(long, and **Trigger*), posted by antigua on March 14, 2005, at 15:49:27
Boy, I wish I knew the right thing to say. I don't have csa issues, but I do have great difficulty opening up to my T even after 5 or 6 years of meeting with her. I tend to assume that slowly but surely this will change and feeling that I can be totally open with her will make a difference in how I feel about myself and how I interact with others. But I, too, sometimes feel that what I wish for will never happen, regardless of how patient she is or how long I stick with it.
I'm a little surprised that you can just walk away after so long a time. When I think about my own situation, I realize I feel so invested in the process that I can't bear the thought of terminating it prematurely. But you're right, who's to know what's premature? And when do you have to accept what you've accomplished and stop trying to accomplish things that might be beyond you?
Why did she ask you if you wanted to come back? That seems like a strange question to ask when you've been seeing her for so long.
When I've had no confidence that things can ever change, I've had the conversation with my T where she explains to me for the umpteenth time what she's doing and how she thinks things are getting better no matter how long, and why she thinks it is taking so long with me and how she feels we'll get there. Sometimes when I have no hope, I can feed off her hope and confidence.
Maybe that's the conversation you need to have with your T before you view your decision as being final. If you do trust her, trust her to be honest with you about what she thinks the two of you can accomplish.
And in the meantime, we're always here.
(((antigua)))
Mair
poster:mair
thread:470958
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050305/msgs/470978.html