Posted by fallsfall on January 11, 2005, at 21:10:19
In reply to Frustrating therapy session today, posted by Angela2 on January 11, 2005, at 14:49:12
My therapist has "accused" me of having unconscious motivations, and I was convinced that he could not possibly be right. After a while, he asked me to "consider the possibility" that he was right. He wasn't asking me to agree with him, just to think about what it would be like if he were right. Sort of a "what if" scenario. So I started thinking about "what if" he were right - what if I did have this unconscious motivation. That led me to see that *if* I had that motivation, then certain things would be likely to be true. As I explored the possibility his theory made more sense, and after much gnashing of teeth, I now agree with him.
He has said that almost always when an unconscious motivation is suggested, the patient will deny it (the motivation is unconscious for a reason...).
So you might want to just "consider the possibility" that you are afraid of this relationship succeeding. What would that mean to you? How could you protect the relationship? What would be the positive and negative aspects of having the relationship fail? Do you expect the relationship to succeed, or to fail - what do you think is most likely?
You don't need to decide anything. The goal is just to think about possibilities. The truth will make itself known in its own time.
Sometimes therapists are completely wrong about this unconscious stuff - but not always.
poster:fallsfall
thread:440708
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050111/msgs/440868.html