Posted by crushedout on October 13, 2004, at 11:59:16
Things have been rough for me lately. I think this relationship I've been in is ending. It's been a source of comfort but lately it's more a source of pain and feeling strangled. I long to have domestic bliss and to be on a team with someone (other than my cat) but I just have never been able to find that someone. Makes me sad. (I do still wish it could be my T.)
I'm not sure how much therapy is supposed to help with all this. It doesn't help enough, it feels like, but I'm not sure my expectations are even realistic. I feel pretty hopeless about ever having what I want. Most of the time, I just feel eaten alive with envy for everyone (their homes, careers, marriages, families, or just contentment) which is just a horrible feeling. I don't like envy. It feels like it almost runs my life these days and not in a good way.
Anyway, I just wanted to share what's going on. I'm not sure I can expect to be helped with any of this.
I'm lost and alone. :(
poster:crushedout
thread:402657
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041002/msgs/402657.html