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Re: feeling very guilty

Posted by Angela2 on August 14, 2004, at 15:03:27

In reply to Re: feeling very guilty » Angela2, posted by shrinking violet on August 14, 2004, at 13:08:50

>why the urge to quit? Is it a rational one, or out of fear/uncertaintly/frustration, etc?

It's definitely irrational. I'll read something from here or I'll be in therapy and I'll get the urge to quit. My parents think I'm crazy because I have dependent tuition free thing. And it's my last year. I'm also afraid of going crazy if I quit. But I just really want to. I'm 21, I can do anything I want, right? I'll get a job, it will probably suck. But it's my decision. I almost wonder what is posessing me to do this. I know why though, I pretty much just don't like school. So do I feel like this is a crazy idea because my parents are telling me it is, or because I know the consequences of it, or because I know it's a foolish decision? Even if this is true, would it be that horrible if I left school for now? Maybe I could go back. I know our society really rewards people who have higher education and thats why I feel guilty about this. So it's making me second guess and question my wish. Sorry if this is jumbled, but I am seriously having strong feelings about leaving school right now and I think I want to go through with them. And I feel awful about it because I think my family will shun me. And there's really nithing wrong with me right now, but I just think I want some time off. And my parents are totally not going to go for it because I'll never get this free ride again. Well, I don't know if I'm crazy for choosing the path I want to choose, maybe someone here can tell me. I'm not sure what my therapist would say except that "it's gonna be harder because you'll have to get a job, pay rent, and lose your insurance."

Well, whatever I decide it's gonna have to be in a couple of days because I don't think I should do it in this impulsive state of mind.

Angela

 

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poster:Angela2 thread:377557
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