Posted by Dinah on July 31, 2004, at 10:08:54
In reply to Re: if the bridge leads to slaughter do you still go?, posted by daisym on July 30, 2004, at 18:46:30
Daisy, you've somehow captured the essence of how I feel about my marriage. My husband's a good man, and we have a good marriage. But my therapist, too, has given up on suggesting the deep heart-to-heart discussions and concentrates more on pragmatic solutions to problems. Some people just aren't introspective, and you can't force them to be. I think I may be growing to consider it a character trait rather than a flaw. I can even see where it serves him well in many situations, as he doesn't agonize over things the way I do. Yet, it means that the techniques that my therapist tries to teach me about communication don't work too well with my husband or parents. The best I can do is understand *them* and work with that understanding.
Do you find that "acting as-if" works especially well with people who aren't particularly introspective? I've found that trying to confront problems is completely useless, but acting "as-if" everything was ok often leads to a better situation overall?
poster:Dinah
thread:372402
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040728/msgs/372604.html