Posted by karen_kay on April 9, 2004, at 21:43:35
In reply to Re: Any response? Anyone? Please?*si trigger* » karen_kay, posted by Racer on April 9, 2004, at 20:52:00
i wasn't fat.. i lost the weight. yet the thoughts and words that my mother said still lingered in my head.
i hated looking in the mirron. when i did, i would cry. in fact, growing up, the only mirror i owned was a small one to do my makeup. that was it.
but, when i got out on my own, i lost weight and started small. i found something that i could like aobut myself. my eyes. (btw, sorry if my typing is horrible, i received my nerve pills today and took them with wine :) but anyway, i started with something i couldn't argue about. i have my father's eyes. dark brown and beautiful.. something i absolutely could not say was ugly. you have to find something about yourself you like and start with that. (and i'm really not meaning to sound preachy, please don't get me wrong) after you convince yourself that there is one physical quality that is beautiful, move on to another.. it worked for me dear. it might just work for you. maybe. it really worked wonders for me.
i'm honestly not trying to sound preachy. and i heard from everyone 'you're not fat at all dear. you look so good, blah blah blah' i still saw the fat, ugly girl in the mirror. now, when i look in my full length mirror, i see a beautiful woman.
i'm sorry you are struggling with this. it's painful, i know. but, you are a strong woman. and one day, youwill see how truly beautiful you are. i know it in my heart. there's no such thing as an ugly person. i really believe that. i once posted that my therapist's wife was ugly. and i stil feel bad about that. she isn't ugly at all. i just think i was angry at him when i posted that. or perhaps i was jealous?
anyway. you'll figure it out. just telling you how i did it. start small dear. do you have a feature that you honestly like about yourself? concentrate on that one. then, move on to the next one dear. in time, you'll figure out that you really are a beautiful woman. i really do believe that. and even though we all have 'things' about ourselves that we don't like, the ones that we do far outweigh the ones that we don't..... you'll foigure it out dear. i realy6 do believe it. but, i feel for you too. know that. (racer) i'd hug you if i was there. and tell you how beautiful you are. until you honestly believe it. i'll be thinking about you for a while dear. actually, for quite a while. take care racer, i really wish i could help you more.
poster:karen_kay
thread:333708
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040409/msgs/334725.html