Posted by fallsfall on February 19, 2004, at 18:11:01
In reply to This one started small???, posted by Karen_kay on February 18, 2004, at 12:49:51
Karen,
Sessions going over the allotted time is one of the commonly mentioned "red flags" that a therapist is experiencing transference. Starting and stopping on time are supposed to be some of the really standard boundaries.
As I understand it, it is OK *occasionally* for a session to go over (maybe 2 - 6 times a year, max?). My old therapist would keep me if she thought I was not safe and hadn't gotten a promise to call her before doing something bad. But it really had to be that serious.
Letting you go over is not teaching you to talk about important things early on and make good use of your time. It is teaching you that if you stall, you'll get more of his time - not a lesson you need to learn.
Sorry to be a wet blanket. I know that it feels special to have him go over. Unfortunately, the things that make us feel special in therapy are usually not very good for us.
poster:fallsfall
thread:315160
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040218/msgs/315823.html