Posted by Dinah on October 13, 2003, at 15:50:38
In reply to Re: Miss my therapist a lot, posted by HannahW on October 13, 2003, at 11:24:03
> I thought just about everybody with transference would move the relationship outside of the office if they could. (So thank goodness for therapists having good boundaries!) Is that not the case?
You just answered your own question, I think. :) The tendency is to think you want an outside relationship, but feeling safe that they'll keep up the boundaries. Which probably means you don't really.
I always play the fantasy through to its conclusion. I have a maternal transference, so if it gets at all painful, I think about having his as a mom. But not the idealized mom he wouldn't be anyway. A real life, pain in the posterior, pick up your clothes, nag about curfew mom. It always makes me happy to leave the mom wishes to the therapy room. :)
I imagine erotic transference could be thought of the same way. If you think of what it would really be like, you might find that what you have is way better.
I wouldn't give up my therapy relationship in the hand for a probably less appealing relationship in the bush.
poster:Dinah
thread:267440
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20031011/msgs/269016.html