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sorry

Posted by alexandra_k on August 1, 2019, at 19:00:33

i'm sorry i broke the 3 post rule.

i have been feeling badly, lately, about having broken it so much.

it did start from a place of meltdown.

and perhaps also a place of personal diary. on writing, or whatever.

but what started as an 'exception to the rule' became the social norm or custom or whatever.

and the boards are worse off for it. because i am 100 per cent certain that at least some posters and / or lurkers simply cannot stand me personally because of some personality clash or whatever and they left because of me. and the boards are worse off for their having left.

and i didn't mean for that to happen. but whether i meant it or not is of little consequence when it comes to the effect.

and the effect on me hasn't been good, either. because i tend to do a similar thing by email. which isn't good. maybe leads me to be spam filtered.

i don't know.

the passport thing turned out to be 5 years not 2 like i said. those 5 years flew by.

just one more year...
just one more year...
just one more year, alex, next year is the year...
just one more year...
one more year...

my life is circling round the drain

i detest this horrible horrible nation.

by the private sector claiming me i just mean...

i used to have faith / trust in government. that rules / laws were for the good of the people, primarily. that government employees like doctors and teachers and the like were working for the good of the people.

i simply don't believe / see that anymore. maybe i was delusional when younger or maybe things are more perverted / corrupt than they used to be.

people want to work for private companies. insurance organisations if you can do statistics. pharmaceutical companies or whatever if you can do biochemistry.

private companies where they want smart and hardworking people.

somewhere you get in with a good group.

my past supervisor used to say these things. used to say things such as these. but he did not sign his students off in a timely fashion. he scaffolded himself up on the backs of their labor. he thought that was acceptable... part of the job... part of the perk at being at the top. part of working your way up from the bottom.

i...

no...

my nieces and nephews all came into money. fathers died young and they got money. they invested in property. their own homes. big enough for them to have boarders / flatmates. so... the boarders / flatmates pay the bulk (all?) of the mortgage on the house. so they have free rent and an asset that accumulates in value. yes they pay rates and maintenene. don't know to be honest wheher the rent from flatmates / boarders covers all of that...

but that's how things work, here.

eat others or be eaten by others. start out being eaten by others. you give them all your stuff and they profit. then you... grow up. come into money of your own. invet that in the start-up costs so you get to rinse and repeat the situation for the next generation. they 'made it in life'. they are landlords not tenants.

if i came into money i wouldn't do that. i would invest in something more modest for just myself and live in it for just myself.

i am not like them.


 

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poster:alexandra_k thread:1105562
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/poli/20190413/msgs/1105562.html