Posted by Free on November 9, 2010, at 22:13:33
In reply to Re: My theory on why I love Dr. Bob.. » glydin50, posted by Solstice on November 9, 2010, at 21:07:03
Solstice,
You would make an excellent CB - Civility Buddy. You've softened me with this post.
I think you just set the bar, Solstice. Nice. :)
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> I understand, Glydin. It can be hard when we feel strongly about an issue and our position isn't favored by the majority.. especially if we genuinely have legitimate points supporting our view. In my life, I've spent my share of time in that spot, and no doubt I'll be there again and again.
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> And you do have the privilege of posting your feelings... I haven't seen anyone step in to tell you that you can't. Maybe the tricky part is that when we (at least for me) feel strongly, we want those who don't agree to see the legitimacy of our position, and we hope they will modify their view to fit ours more closely. When that doesn't happen, that's where we might feel we stand alone.. unheard. And I guess as far as Psychobabble goes, I think you can probably count on this particular issue not changing. It might be a 'cause' worth laying down. I know it's not about how you feel about Deneb. I've seen you be very generous-spirited and kind to Deneb during struggles she's shared with the community.
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> For myself, along the way (of life) I've adopted a few 'policies' (for lack of a better word) to help deal with things I'm not crazy about. One of them is that if there is something going on that I don't like and I can't change it or get away from it, I try to find a way to 'hold hands' with it.. to even make a friend out of what's chaffing me. That takes me into a mindset of figuring out a way to perceive it that allows me to co-exist with something I can't get rid of so it doesn't irritate me.
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> I do realize that somewhere this situation is chaffing you, but as for me, Deneb's postings about her love for Dr. Bob have never bothered me. To be sure, it's unusual. It's also very 'young,' whimsical... innocent. The butterfly image I have of her when she makes her Dr.Bob-love posts... it's a tentative little thing... it will land somewhere briefly to open its wings and share, then off it flies.. we don't know when it will pop in again.. but it is easily startled. The whimsy of it always leaves me smiling. I've been impressed with how much clarity Deneb has about the fantasy-nature of it. She knows it's not 'real.' That's why it doesn't cause me to worry. She enjoys feeling attached to him, it provides her a sense of safety and connection. She's clear about how much it helps her cope - and although maybe it's not as mature of a way to cope as what you might like for yourself, she is genuinely at peace with it. I'm just sharing my own musings... take what you like if you find something in there helpful to you..
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> Solstice
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poster:Free
thread:969296
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20101014/msgs/969508.html