Posted by BayLeaf on August 12, 2009, at 21:31:33
In reply to Re: feeling uncomfortable » BayLeaf, posted by Dr. Bob on August 12, 2009, at 4:53:04
Bob - you were fine with people suggesting Deneb change HER behavior, but when someone suggest you change YOUR behavior....whoa!! You throw out the apology card? Um, no I don't feel supported.
This situation took 2 people to create. One to simply generate sweet feelings, and one who encouraged it with hugs, dinner, drinks, site seeing, playing with her stuffed animal, etc. If that is not a boundary concern, I don't know what is?
If her strong feelings did not exist (say with other Babblers who have neutral feelings), the above behavior would not seem quite so problematic. But you were completely aware of Deneb's feelings. So, yes, imo, boudaries were not appropriately maintained.
Is expressing that wrong? I'm just laying out all the facts as presented in previously posts.
Deneb, I don't want to hurt you, or take away any joy. It may not seem like it, but I really only want to help.
bay
poster:BayLeaf
thread:908960
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20090707/msgs/911837.html