Posted by BayLeaf on August 5, 2009, at 17:58:32
In reply to Re: feeling uncomfortable, posted by Dr. Bob on August 5, 2009, at 4:27:03
What I see is erotic tranference which is completely stuck. It cannot be processed by you in this context. You are not her therapist nor her pdoc. You have not made efforts, which I have seen to assist her to process, understand, and abate this highly charged emotion.
There are many people here who have experienced erotic love for their T, or pdoc, whoever. It take a LOT of work for both parties to resolve. Poor Deneb is simply stuck in it. You are not (from what I can see in public posts) trying to assist her.
That is what is painful for me. I know this will end in pain. It's unrequited "love". You are a professional looking at her as a nice poster. The longer it goes on, the more painful it will be. She needs to be treated for this. It's obsessive, erotic transference for which she is not getting help.
You seeing her at Babble gatherings is just the *opposite* of helpful. You are leading her into thinking you 2 can have a relationship of any sort. Clearly that is not possible, and imo its downright emotionally dangerous for her.
I am not saying that YOU are the one to treat her. But, you ought to privately be explaining this to her, and encouraging her to work hard on getting past this so she can work on the real issues.
Bay
poster:BayLeaf
thread:908960
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20090707/msgs/910429.html