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Sorry, and thanks for the comments » Dr. Bob

Posted by Phoenix1 on February 14, 2008, at 17:16:44

In reply to Re: I-statements » Phoenix1, posted by Dr. Bob on February 14, 2008, at 0:57:58

> Phoenix,
>
> Thanks for your support. But it can be especially challenging to support a block in a civil way. Try to stick to I-statements. For example, instead of:
>
> > I have to say that I feel that the discussion that got him blocked was offensive to me personally.
> >
> > I really like linkadge and his posts, but that one thread seemed out of line to me.
>
> an alternative might be something like:
>
> > I have to say that I personally felt offended by the discussion that got him blocked.
> >
> > I really like linkadge and his posts, but I disagree with how he phrased that one post.
>
> For more about I-statements, see:
>
> http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20040112/msgs/320097.html
>
> Thanks,
>
> Bob

Sorry Dr. Bob,

And sorry linkadge, if you took offense to how I responded to the discussion of your block. That was not my intention.

I did try to make I statements wherever possible, but I see how your rephrased I statements are less accusatory, and inflammatory. I'm still working on this "I" statement thing, so I appreciate your comments. I will work a little harder next time. I took a piece of advice from an old thread, I think it might have been from Dinah, something to the effect of "don't write anything that you wouldn't say in a face to face conversation with a person". I think I followed this advice in my post, as I certainly edited it once or twice to tone down my feelings of anger that had infiltrated the original reply I wrote.

I'm finding it a little difficult walking the line between effectively expressing my opinions civilly, and saying nothing meaningful but remaining civil. Does that make sense? If you really concentrate on civility too much, it can make it hard to say anything meaningful at all.

Thanks again,

Phoenix1


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URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20080204/msgs/812736.html